this post was submitted on 24 Dec 2023
1012 points (97.7% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

26909 readers
2267 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 158 points 11 months ago (10 children)

Unethical life pro tip: want to kill yourself but left something for your family? Buy a life insurance policy, call the suicide prevention hotline and wait for the cops to kill you. Isn't technically suicide, so the life insurer can't deny your family claim!!

[–] [email protected] 44 points 11 months ago

You think the cops wouldn't mark as a suicide?

[–] [email protected] 38 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Suicide by cop is a real thing.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 11 months ago (2 children)

In all seriousness does the insurance still pay it if it's suicide by cop?

[–] [email protected] 26 points 11 months ago

Probably not, most insurers love to have every possible exception in the contract (e.g. taking part in illegal activity), to get out of payment

[–] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago

It was suicide. Claim denied!

But he had a heart attack.

We have a receipt that shows he ate McDonald’s 3 years ago. This is clearly suicide by food.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 11 months ago

Cops will still claim it was suicide-by-cop. Which is some top-tier copaganda, because it’s just another way of them saying “if you call us while in distress, there’s a good chance we’ll kill you then blame you for it.”

[–] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago (1 children)

At least in Canada life insurance will still cover you committing suicide, but it has to occur 1-2 years after your plan starts.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

Same with my policy in the US. Already have it seasoned past the mark, so I joke with my wife that I can make her a millionaire.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago

Insurance companies hate this new easy trick.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago (6 children)

Or pay off the corner to list your death as natural causes or something.

Like my uncle did.

load more comments (6 replies)
load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 95 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I guarantee his death is listed as "suicide" in the official report.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 11 months ago (2 children)

I mean, without context it's hard to tell, but suicide by cops is a thing, some people take advantage of the trigger happiness of cops and make them kill them.

[–] [email protected] 46 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

"make" them

cop drops two mags into a non-threat

HE MADE ME DO IT!

reloads for a third mag

gotta be sure

[–] [email protected] 20 points 11 months ago

"It's coming right for us!"

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

This comment is elsewhere in this post with exclusively upvotes but you getting down voted for some reason lol

[–] [email protected] 88 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Can't die from suicide if you die from homicide first

[–] [email protected] 24 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Can't go to hell from suicide if someone kills you

[–] [email protected] 36 points 11 months ago (3 children)

True but unfortunately his pants were 2% elastane so he will, in fact, still be going to hell

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 27 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Oh sht. The cops were the good guys all along. They're angels sent by God to take us all to heaven 🙏🙏🙏

/s (I'm going to vomit from having to type that)

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 70 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I mean…technically the suicide was prevented.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 69 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

saved himself a quarter by not usin one of them fancy suicide booths

[–] [email protected] 18 points 11 months ago (1 children)

That is why you put the quarter on a string

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 62 points 11 months ago (1 children)

He reportedly yelled "killsteal"

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

I’m going to hell for laughing so hard at this.

[–] [email protected] 46 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

Swedish. I remember when this was on TV.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 11 months ago

Trained, qualified police doing quality police work keeping dangerous people with guns off the street, got it.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 11 months ago

That could have been the poor man's plan all along. Suicide by cop. Local PD is just providing a free service. If only there was another way.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Never call cops to solve a problem for you because then you have TWO problems.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago (1 children)

pro tip: Whatever problem you have, just throw a molotov cocktail at it.

now you have a totally different problem!

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 21 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I can't find a single source or article about this. I think this a scare meme meant to frighten people away from using the new 988 suicide prevention hotline number.

This is a very irresponsible post that can harm a lot of people.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I think it was this but he gets shot by a state trooper, not the SWAT team. But SWAT members were called to try to help negociate. He had a gun and was intoxicated, which is kinda expexted with being suicidal anyways. It doesn't show in the article him threatening anyone.

https://news.yahoo.com/suicidal-man-calls-crisis-hotline-220712118.html

[–] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago

another article for this incident, guess he came to the door during crisis negotiations, cop saw him with a gun, shot him. Did you think he'd be threatening to kill himself with an eggbeater, there, 15 year vet cop Sgt Jessie Hartsock?

https://www.wbaltv.com/article/fatal-police-shooting-carroll-county-under-investigation/44093015

[–] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Why the hell would you send a SWAT team to someone suicidal? O.o

[–] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Guess he called hotline saying he's gonna take someone else's life before his own?

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago
[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Curb Your Suicide

[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago

Is this like door dash for saddies?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (5 children)

To anyone who's feeling down around this time of year, call 911 or 988. Nothing is better than having you around.

Edit:

I really feel strongly about this and I misworded my message. Get help if you need it.

You matter to me. I mean that with all of my heart.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Nothing is better than having you around.

I get what you're saying here, but it strikes me as funny that this sentence could also be read to mean that having nothing around is better than having you there.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Oh, wow. That's a different take that I hadn't considered. I'll be anyone's something. Even for a single comment... and that's way better than nothing.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 21 points 11 months ago

Uhhhhhhhhh, very funny to recommend calling the police in the comments on a post about a man getting killed by the police because he called for help.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago

Given the context of the post, might not be the best idea

[–] [email protected] 12 points 11 months ago (1 children)

cops murder suicidal man

if youre suicidal, get thr cops involved!

I love your energy, friend. Thank you for caring about strangers. In this world, that means a lot. However, I think this advice is very region-specific. In most of America, for instance, this isn't good advice. This is closer to calling the Army than a crisis counsellor. In other places, where police have the resources to help someone in this position, this may be excellent advice.

There are probably better places to direct people for resources like this. Don't stop fighting; fight more effectively. If you can't find anything better to link people, @ me and I'll try to help

<3

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Please don't suggest that people call 911. Not in the replies to this article.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

I don't know if this claim is real or not but similar things (not involving SWAT) can happen. I suggest you check out the Safe Hotlines initiative.

https://translifeline.org/safe-hotlines/

If you need to use a suicide/crisis hotline, just make sure you are aware of the possibility of having police called on you, but please still reach out to a hotline if you need to.

load more comments
view more: next ›