A lot of the time "normal" is an ableist concept, and the solutions provided are basically just to "mask harder".

I think a more actionable thing people can work on to be "normal" is to seek emotional regulation. Anyone can work to get their emotions, especially anger, under control. Very few people are actually normal by this definition, of course. People are angry as fuck, and my solution to this has just been to care less and be more patient.

People get mad when driving for example, especially because the person in front of them isn't speeding as much as they'd like. Care less about how quickly you arrive at your destination. Care less about the mistakes other drivers make. We will all get there when we get there, and that's okay.

There are things outside of our control, and what we can control is how we react to things. To some degree, a big solution to stress is to just not stress about things. That seems unhelpful, but the point is to change one's mindset and to avoid dwelling on inconveniences.

Of course, people also get angry in the face of injustice. That's a whole other thing, and I think people should actually focus all of their anger on this.

Watch sports, the office, breaking bad, and severance via paid streaming services. Never pirate

Drink exactly 2 beers

Have you tried having a special interest in Sonic and then infodumping about it to everyone around you?

Can't be using bearsite anymore.

Detroit: Become Normal

You don't have to be normal to be liked by those around you. I've had lots of neurodivergent coworkers who are well liked by their colleagues they're people who care about others and are helpful. Many of them still talk about special interests at work to people, but they know when to stop. Many of them can read other's body language, but if you absolutely can't the most important thing you do is plan lulls in the conversation so they have the opportunity to interject. Let them respond, and ask for their response. Even if they aren't interested they appreciate that you are asking their opinion, allowing them to contribute, and let them leave the conversation if they want to.

I don't consider these coworkers "normal", but they have a "normal" relationship with their coworkers meaning they have friends and are invited out lunches and even events outside of work. These people have what many are seeking without having to "mask", just moderate. Also contribute to conversations started by others. Everyone appreciates being able to speak, even if it's the same boring conversation about the weather or whatever. Also if someone wants to talk about sports and you don't know anything, just tell them that. People appreciate that kind of honesty vs faking trying to contribute.

You won't win everyone over, some people just won't like you because you're different. Just make friends with the ones you can and it'll help you feel a lot more relaxed at work.

This is probably biased by my ADHD bullshit, but I think a huge part of it is trying to keep your outward expressions of energy at no higher than 7/10. People like a “That’s amazing.” a lot more than a “THATS AMAZING!”

Another part is learning to socialize beyond reciting facts at a person. Gotta ask follow up questions, use body language and eye contact and learn to read the ever-shifting social vibe. A joke that would have worked five minutes ago might not work now.

Don't be like Trotsky Don't do things like this: https://hexbear.net/pictrs/image/58f0dc79-85ca-4c64-9939-50282d7744b4.png?format=webp

That's a better way of phrasing the idea than just "normal"

I can tell you what not to do, when two ladies in your union start talking about DnD, don't start bouncing up and down in excitement as you wait for your turn to enter the conversation. That's really not normal. It went fine for me though because we're all notedly neuro nonconforming, but even for us it was commented on

Yeah I got you: don't

What even is normal? Like amerikkkan "normal" of being a bigot and wanting to legally murder people?

Being normal is overrated.

Pickleball

Crochet

Watching The Office

Professional Sports

Have lots of opinions on the weather