The Onion

I'm from Chicago and my conservative, suburban family members all think and speak like this. Making comments about avoiding anything "south of" means you're racist. Always. I live on the southside. Throw in some disparaging remarks about the pride parade and you've got yourself an exact replica.

I fucking hate them.

Portland*

I’ve heard similar from relatives about California.

Admittedly, we Chicagoans don't always go out of our way to correct misconceptions. Chicago has plenty of people. We often don't feel any need to encourage more visitors.