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[+] 119 points 2 years ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 child)
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[โ€“] 96 points 2 years ago (15 children)
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[+] 95 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (9 children)
  • [โ€“] 40 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    This. Someone who is willing to come down to my ignorant level in a subject and reward me for my tiny effort and interest in it, is an immediate win in my book. Though it is a hard line to cross without going into smirky/mansplaining territory.

    For example, Veritasium videos are always fantastic, but I can't get over how the man smirks when he explains concepts, despite the fact that it's his natural smile.

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    [โ€“] 81 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    They are happy to see you!

    They handle stress and disappointment well.

    They don't externalize their frustrations, and take responsibility for solving their own problems. They act like a functioning adult.

    They have interests and hobbies that they are happy to do alone, or share.

    Unfair - but they don't have intense money, drug, social pressure in their life, a stable situation is the good grounds for relationships

    bonus: If their parents are attractive, then they could be a good partner who ages gracefully with you

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  • [โ€“] 77 points 2 years ago (5 children)
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    [โ€“] 75 points 2 years ago (6 children)

    If a person carries their trash with them until they stumble upon a trash bin they instantly have a plus in my book.

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    [โ€“] 53 points 2 years ago (40 children)

    Kindness to animals. Just all animals, generally

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    [โ€“] 53 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    The simple virtue of being able to genuinely express these words; "I don't know", "Sorry" and "Thank you" (or any derivative of these*).

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    [โ€“] 51 points 2 years ago (57 children)
    • vegan
    • soft spoken
    • patient
    • hands scarred/calloused from work
    • creases in face from smiling
    • casual manner/attire
    • walks around other earthlings on footpaths etc instead of through
    • puts their shopping trolley away, bonus if they round up others
    • mocks authority
    • is kind to children and listens to them seriously
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    [+] [B] 51 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)
    [โ€“] 49 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    They're self aware. Understand the difference between subjectivity and objectivity. When they encounter someone different, they don't judge, see it as a learning opportunity. Put thought into their words. If you ask them a question, you can see them carefully thinking about it.

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  • [โ€“] 17 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (3 children)

    Everyone judges, it's how you act upon that judgement that is the mark of your character. Anyone that says "I don't judge" is either full of shit or means that they are self aware of their biases, conscious and subconscious and don't act upon their judgements.

    Judging people is a natural part of being human and impossible to not do.

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    [โ€“] 45 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    Only kicks upwards, not downwards. Has a backbone and principles. Doesn't value money over meaning. Likes to teach people instead of putting oneself over them.

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    [โ€“] 38 points 2 years ago

    Expresses disagreement with people talking shit about others when they don't have to

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  • [โ€“] 35 points 2 years ago

    People who treat others who cannot benefit them well. For example, wait staff.

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  • [โ€“] 35 points 2 years ago (17 children)

    Actually intelligent, reads books, sense of humor, actually listens.

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    [โ€“] 32 points 2 years ago (8 children)

    No particular order:

    • Being a furry/furry sympathetic.
    • A science major of any kind. IMO the S needs more love in STEM.
    • Ever overhear them say "walkable" in a positive light.
    • Hobbies besides media consumption
    • Not "too cool" to learn something. Likes learning for fun.
    • Not to concerned with looking cool or badass, either. Look at CHUDs, I made a joke the other day that I can sense a decent bit of residual 90's 'tude in modern CHUDDery, and I think I'm onto something.
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    [โ€“] 32 points 2 years ago*

    Treats everyone with respect regardless of what their perceived status is.

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  • [โ€“] [S] 30 points 2 years ago (4 children)

    I should probably add my own. They like plants

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    [โ€“] 30 points 2 years ago

    When they call you because they're at the supermarket and you might want something.

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  • [โ€“] 29 points 2 years ago* (9 children)

    They talk about Pokemon in the first date and will defend gen whatever while still calling it shit.

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    [โ€“] 28 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 child)

    Their soul is sufficiently supple for the ritual.

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  • [โ€“] 26 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    They're a fucking weirdo like me and so don't mind being goofy a good bit of the time.

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    [โ€“] 23 points 2 years ago

    They can laugh at themselves. Not to the point of self deprecation, but they can acknowledge when they're wrong or dumb

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  • [โ€“] 21 points 2 years ago (4 children)

    Having red and yellow or red and black flags on their clothing/accessories

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    [โ€“] 21 points 2 years ago

    They actually show up, or, failing that, tell you they aren't going to show up and summarize why and when the next best time is.

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  • [โ€“] 20 points 2 years ago

    I feel like everything is a green flag until a red flag pops up. Like how an open road is functionally a permission to cintinue driving.

    There are things where I get excited about a person, but even then red flags are more important. "Never admits to wrongdoing" and "Thinks kicking down a door and screaming at your partner is an appropriate response to leaving a mug in the wrong cupboard" is going to flatly be more important in a relationship than "does activism" or "is house trained".

    That said, I don't like arguing all the time and do organising stuff irl, so it would be nice to agree politically on a bunch of things. Responds to texts/messages and seems excited to build conversation with me.

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  • [โ€“] 20 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Good range of spices - preferably slightly more than they have enough room for.

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    [โ€“] 19 points 2 years ago

    its more of a long term green flag but whenever someone listens to me, like brings up something i mentioned ages ago or whatever, its just a nice little thing i appreciate a lot

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  • [โ€“] 19 points 2 years ago

    communism, support for palestine

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  • [โ€“] 19 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Cutting the bullshit and getting straight to the point. If I wanna play games I have a playstation.

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    [โ€“] 18 points 2 years ago (3 children)
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    [โ€“] 17 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    They are open to the idea that they could be at fault in any given situation but neither always assume they are nor always assume they are not.

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    [โ€“] 17 points 2 years ago (4 children)
    • Eager to discuss the cool things they've read.

    • Able to make me laugh.

    • Cleans up after themselves (I know, low bar).

    • Communist of some stripe.

    Superficial but:

    • Physically stronger than me.
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    [โ€“] 17 points 2 years ago

    They communicate honestly

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  • [โ€“] 17 points 2 years ago

    When they pay back what they owe without being reminded.

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  • [+] 17 points 2 years ago* (last edited 1 year ago)
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