this post was submitted on 22 Oct 2023
547 points (97.6% liked)

internet funeral

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[–] [email protected] 60 points 1 year ago (1 children)

One for dying alone in the woods, please.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (2 children)

... this option is beginning to feel a bit crowded, will there be like a line or something? Is scheduling an option? I don't want to be around people, ew

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

everyone's in the woods now. It isn't really alone anymore.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

There's always somewhere to be alone if you're willing to travel far enough. Nobody's going to live in the rocky, frozen wastes of the Canadian Shield for example

[–] [email protected] 55 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I'll make conceptual art alone in the woods, just like my father did after joining the army.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

I'm just a "happy" little accident

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

I'm sorry for your loss

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Woods. I choose woods. 🪵 🪵 🪵

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Yeah, idk what it says about me that this choice seemed like a good deal.

When it's time for me, an easy death surrounded by quiet and nature seems like the best way.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Dying in the woods alone please.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'll have the same, but like far enough from this person to still feel alone

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Aren't you alone as soon as they finish dying?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Ain't nobody got time for that!!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

Why can't I make conceptual art in the woods?

Your odds of dying alone in the woods aren't bad if you join the Army.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Can I just die right now? That'd be more convenient.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

No, go to the woods first, instructions are clear :D

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My lifelong goal is to become a legendary hermit in the mountains somewhere.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If you're legendary people will keep making the hike to bother you tho

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Hey, just because you're destined to die alone in the woods doesn't mean you can't help the interlopers to the same destiny...

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

... Conceptual art. My father may have been effeminate, but he wasn't as feminine as I'm about to become.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'll take "all of the above"!

(er... not at the same time, please.)

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

At least two of those are a true and tested combination.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

I'll take doing alone in the woods. Really joining the army seems like the worst choice. Though I guess that depends on your father.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

It has some options missing.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

So, by using the word "include", am I to assume that there are even more options beyond these few?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

"Your options include and damn well are limited to..."

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

God, anything but conceptual art...

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I think it's more fun if you're the one making it. Like jazz

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I'm not a part of your system

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Is this the artist Don’t Fret?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Knocked out 3 of those. Now how to make conceptual art? Hmmmm.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

In the words of one of my favorite songs

"Death is when life turns into art"

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

This is like a David Shrigley piece.