this post was submitted on 20 Jun 2023
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Mildly Infuriating

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https://www.reddit.com/r/mildlyinfuriating/comments/pvz8rm/my_grandmas_lunch_at_her_new_senior_living/

Special thanks to @[email protected] for pointing out how mobile links from reddit have tracking

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all 47 comments
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[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I worked at a nursing home as a cook, I guess it was a nice one? We had a nutritionist and made like cafeteria food, then chopped half of it up for the people who had problems, then puréed it for the ones who couldn’t feed themselves.

Profit has become a tyrant. We used to make people happy in its name, now we shape everything in its service.

[–] [email protected] -3 points 2 years ago

Profit has become a tyrant

Unfortunately, I disagree. I think it's become hero. It shouldn't but it is.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

Nursing home I imagine by the price?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I wish I noticed that before someone embarrassed me in the comments 😪

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Edit and it never happened 😉

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

What never happened? I didn’t see anything. 🙂

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (2 children)

I worked for years in a nursing home and I can tell you that it is total bullshit. Everything is the lowest quality at the highest markup. Let me assure you that the staffing at 99% of these places is so low that the residents are waiting 20-30 min to use the restroom and basically live trapped in a bed with little to no assistance.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

When my grandmother was unable to live on her own we moved her up to where we live. She had a good amount of money stashed away, so shopped every nice facility in town, and picked what seemed like the nicest one. While I would say the food didn't look as terrible as the picture in the OP, it wasn't much better. Multiple other issues at these places though, staff not helping, not giving meds on time, falling and not getting assistance for hours. One of the worst was falling, having to go to the hospital, and never letting emergency contacts know. We found out when the hospital called, because her charts didn't seem to match up. Turns out they sent the wrong charts to the hospital. Thank god she didn't have any allergies. We ended up moving her to another facility that was even more expensive, and promised none of these things would happen there. Turns out that wasn't true, so my parents finally ended up moving to a new home where they could finish the basement and build an apartment for her with full time care hired to come by.

I used to always think if you had the financial part of old age figured out you'd be okay, boy was I wrong.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

I just talked with a coworker about this today. Her dad lost his leg because they failed to respond to a foot infection and they then also blamed him for not telling them soon enough… It’s disgusting how we treat the elderly in those facilities (and here we pay double those 3k btw…) I was forced to work in a nursing home for 2 months as part of my civil duty (military service substitution). I couldn’t do it anymore, it just kills you how they treat some people. Those are grown adults and I was told they can’t have a small knife to cut vegetables, not because they were unsafe with them but just as a matter of policy. Others where given clothes to fold that afterwards where thrown back into the same bucket that they came from to be folded again tomorrow. They were lied to and treated with less respect than little kids… And then the whole COVID thing in addition to that where they couldn’t see anyone and had to endure this idiocy basically 24/7.

I really never thought about suicide but if I end up in such a facility when I’m old, I might have to reevaluate my stance on that… that’s not living, that’s dying in installments while being drained of your money….

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago

That’s not food. That’s sadness in polystyrene.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

That’s more than mildly infuriating my guy. That’s just cruel.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

Just like with r/Mildlyinfuriating It's like it never left!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago

Much more than mildly infuriating.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

My ex (we broke up a year ago and don't talk) worked as a nurse in an expensive nursing home. Some of the stories she's told me about how they treat staff and even patients are shocking.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

Does anyone recognize what that beige slop is in the lower compartment?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Bro they trying to starve them to make more room for new clients

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

This doesn't look appetizing at all, however the amount doesn't seem that unrealistic for old people.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

I'm not sure about that. The veggies are relatively low in calories. The chicken and dumplings would be really high in calories but that's a very small amount.

My best guess is this plate is less than 200-250 calories. We're missing a lot of detail here though. It might not be three equal calorie meals per day. This might not be what your average person gets someone might have just pissed in their Wheaties.

Assuming that's one of three daily meals with equal calories, that's probably about half the calories even someone in total lethargy would need to survive.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago

Looks about right. I worked in a retirement home for 4 years. 2 in the kitchen and 2 doing maintenance. These residents were paying upwards of $10k a month and the food was fucking awful 90% of the time. Not only is the food super shitty but they dont even get all their meals included in their monthly rent so if they wanted 3 meals a day (Breakfast, lunch, dinner) then you had to choose which meal you wanted to pay for out of pocket. These retirement/nursing homes are predatory as hell. I know its not possible for everyone but if you love your parents, do them a favor and keep them out of these homes.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

Urgh. Disgusting how terribly humans treat other humans.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Is there even any point in getting old. I hope I don't make it that long.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

My retirement is dying while training the AI that will replace me

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

Disgusting. Some of the SNF (skilled nursing facilities) in good ole USA are just criminal organizations

@[email protected] appreciate the shoutout. Oddly enough I just happened to stumble upon this post. Did not see this in my “Mentions”

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Dang, where is there a nursing home for 3k a month? My dad had to go into a nursing home here in Colorado, and had to private pay out of his savings until it was exhausted and the Medicaid kicked in. Private pay at the cheapest place in town was 7.2k a month minimum, and the food was about like that. They shut that facility down a few years ago, and he got moved to a much nicer one that still took medicaid. Food is orders of magnitude better there. Not all places ate like that, but they are all very expensive for private pay.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

I work with a lot of retirees. Many daycare centers require full access and history to their retirees to know how much their making. Wether they gave 3k or 7k or monthly income they want it all.

No difference in what service is provided regardless of the pay to the institution either.

Unsure if regulation would help or hurt this industry but it may be necessary.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

My cat eats better than this and I buy the cheap stuff.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

We kept our mom out of a nursing home specifically for the food and staffing and overpriced everything reasons. When we looked them all over, even the $5000 a month place had residents calling out for help endlessly, with just two nurses aides working over 100 residents. So sad. Profit over care, from insurance to nursing home.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago (1 children)

That single broccoli makes me wheep.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

Oh no. Please don't tell me that's what that diseased morsel in the top left corner is.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago (1 children)

WTF is that blue thing? Please tell me that's not a broccoli floret

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

Looks like a purple cauliflower floret.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

It's not about the money, they're not even trying to make something decent...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

Appalled that the nursing home experience being poor is so widespread. Where I live, nursing homes are largely private enterprises receiving government funds and are poorly regulated. Residents often have to take out reverse mortgages if they own their homes to fund their nursing home residencies. And yes, the food is still often that bad.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

You have understand, 2k of that is just for rent. By the time they get done paying the staff there's not any money left for food. This is actually a public service!

/s

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I don't even wanna know what that blue thing in the left hand corner is. Yuck.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

Looks like purple broccoli.

Done right it's lovely.

This is not done right.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

People leaving USA for cheaper healthcare. Maybe we need to leave for better long term care.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

People leaving USA.... Maybe we need to leave....

There, FTFY. 🤓🤘🏼 There's more than enough reasons these days. Frankly, the main one keeping me here for a little while longer is just the youngin' aging into independence. We're GTFO after that. 🤌🏼

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

My dad is in an assisted living facility and this is unfortunately the type of food he gets. I have to send him groceries every week just so I can be sure he's getting enough to eat.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

for anyone with a loved one in a nursing home: try to visit often! there are pros and cons to letting them know ur coming vs coming unexpectedly. if u let them know ur visiting, theyll probably make some nice food for everyone that day (in my experience at least). on the other hand, if u visit unexpectedly, u can get a better idea of how theyre really treated.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 years ago (1 children)

You've got the brocoli??? You lucky bastard ;-)

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

Why it gray tho

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Is 3K considered cheap or costly in the US for nursing home? In any case, this food doesnt look appetizing at all. In India, we still havent gotten these as currently the children are expected to care for their older parents. But when my generation becomes old we probably need to check ourselves into these facilities.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

Both really. 36,000$ per year is a lot of money, but as far as nursing homes go, you can easily get up to 120,000$ per year or more.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 2 years ago

That's horrible. I hope this gets fixed soon.