424
Speculation Rule (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

Based on a true story.

[Alt-text]A brain asks a woman in bed, "Hey you goin' to sleep?". The woman responds, "Yes, now shut up". The brain says, "The internet is speculating that Trump died." The woman has a dead eye stare and is not going to sleep in a timely fashion.

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[-] [email protected] 139 points 3 weeks ago

I feel like I'll know when he's dead.....like the air will somehow be easier to breathe.

[-] [email protected] 42 points 3 weeks ago

Less cheeto dust in the wind...

[-] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago

The air will be filled with cheering and celebration

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[-] [email protected] 103 points 3 weeks ago

Vance said 'I'm ready to be president, just in case' and some people were like 'oh shit, it's happening!'.

[-] [email protected] 71 points 3 weeks ago

People were starting to talk about Trumps politics again instead of the Epstein files so they planted a new distraction.

It's so obvious and yet we keep falling for it.

[-] [email protected] 25 points 3 weeks ago

I don't think they would deliberately use a distraction that paints Trump as being weak.

[-] [email protected] 11 points 3 weeks ago
[-] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago

Release the Epstein Files, Pedo Trump

[-] [email protected] 18 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah but do we really think Vance has the, idk what you'd call it, moron-charm? Charm that attracts only morons? Whatever it is that Trump offers?

[-] [email protected] 11 points 3 weeks ago

He doesn't. Vance has all the personality and presence of cold oatmeal.

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[-] [email protected] 87 points 3 weeks ago

Hey Americans, this is a feature of living under authoritarianism: to have a widespread conspiracy theory that the incumbent was replaced by the double. Get used to it.

[-] [email protected] 16 points 3 weeks ago
[-] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

Trump is already a mushroom, just ask Stormy Daniels

[-] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago

"Trump is a mushroom" will occur in 20 years when the population finds it unable to exist in a reality without Trump.

[-] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago

Wait, Paul isn't dead?

[-] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah the cultists that voted him in who are starting to realize what is really unfolding in our country can't believe it. "It can't really be him, he loves us, he cares for us! It must be a fake!"

[-] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago

None of those people have enough self reflection or care for others to give a shit what is unfolding. As long as "the right people" are being hurt they are happy.

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[-] [email protected] 63 points 3 weeks ago

If he hasn't, can we start a conspiracy theory that he's been replaced?

[-] [email protected] 27 points 3 weeks ago

What do you mean "theory," he definitely has been

;)

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[-] [email protected] 56 points 3 weeks ago
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[-] [email protected] 50 points 3 weeks ago
[-] [email protected] 50 points 3 weeks ago

And I am saving this for when the child molester is dead.

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[-] [email protected] 46 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

God damn it.

Don't give me hope.

[-] [email protected] 35 points 3 weeks ago

Great! 11½ years of Vance 😥

[-] [email protected] 43 points 3 weeks ago

If following the law, which let's face it, they won't, then it would only be 7½ years of Vance. According to the 22nd Amendment if anyone takes over for the President before the two year mark, then they are only allowed to run for one extra term. If they take over after the two year mark then they may run for two more terms, for a maximum of ten years.

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[-] [email protected] 21 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

There is about a 0 percent chance Vance wins an election without Trump's coat tails to ride.

Vance will not be able to hold the coalition together.

[-] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago

Cute that you think you'll get elections.

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[-] [email protected] 33 points 3 weeks ago

Don't get my hopes up

[-] [email protected] 32 points 3 weeks ago

Nah we'll know when he does. More likely he's ill, possibly on the way out.

[-] [email protected] 26 points 3 weeks ago
[-] [email protected] 25 points 3 weeks ago

supreme leaders cannot die. they simply pass the torch to the next chosen

[-] [email protected] 17 points 3 weeks ago

What's the story behind this?

[-] bdonvr 26 points 3 weeks ago

He hasn't made any public appearance in a few days and cancelled some this weekend iirc

It's probably nothing but damn wouldn't it be funny

[-] [email protected] 11 points 3 weeks ago

~~funny~~ fucking glorious

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[-] [email protected] 18 points 3 weeks ago

The rumor mill is running late into the night on BlueSky and apparently Twitter. I haven't seen anything compelling. But I'm still awake so...

[-] [email protected] 15 points 3 weeks ago

This is so real. I was literally finally laying down when my brother got me with this.

[-] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago

Please let me wake up to a brighter world. For once, pls

[-] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

i thought the fourth panel would be her finally getting a good night's sleep.

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[-] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago

he never was alive to begin with

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[-] [email protected] 10 points 3 weeks ago
[-] [email protected] 10 points 3 weeks ago
[-] [email protected] 18 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

"Trump dead" has a cleaner graph because it's a 10x more common way people phrase it.

[-] [email protected] 17 points 3 weeks ago

I'm from the 20th century. We spoke differently back then.

[-] [email protected] 32 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

No, you didn't.

Stars&Stripes Newspaper: "Hitler Dead"

It's just that people are looking for headlines.

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[-] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago

Just popped over to Bsky to look. Don't tease me, universe...

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this post was submitted on 30 Aug 2025
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