Khrushchev's secret speech [leaked] [real] (hexbear.net)

submitted 3 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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Comrades do you ever see stalin and think to yourself "Oh the ways..... I would sexually disappoint stalin".

I'm going through some self esteem issues comrades I'll be honest. Look comrades I will level with you, lets say me and stalin hit it off. The sex isn't going to be good. BUT THE BREAKFAST 😏, HUHHHH. What does comrade stalin like, crepes? We'll go for crepes. Throw some nutella on those mf. AVOCADOS if you're NASTY.

And I'm gonna stay Haaard the whoooole tiiiime.

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[-] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago

But the breakfast tho

[-] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago

Every time I see a picture of him, I'm just reminded of all the paintings and posters of him being nice to kids, often hugging or holding a really little one, and I want a "dad hug" from him. (Probably has less to do with older Stalin being a total DILF and more to do with the fact that my dad isn't much of a hugger, and wasn't one even when I was little, so actually getting a dad hug from my actual dad isn't necessarily easy or accessible.)

[-] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago

I bet he gave the best hugs

[-] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

I mean, I do joke a lot about bears giving the best hugs, because I have this plush panda that really does give the best snuggles, when he's not being sectarian and saying "no hugs for revisionists" and similar lines (he really likes to ask "so are you a Maoist, or are you wrong?" in particular, but, like, what can you expect from a panda, right?), and there's probably a good bit in there about the Soviet Bear, Stalin giving off serious Papa Bear energy, and also being the General Secretary.

So yeah, Papa Bear Stalin probably gave the best bear hugs. Wish I could compare one to a Comrade Cuddles hug. The bear's got the soft plush fur, but Stalin's got Dad Energy and everyone loves a good dad hug.

^ Comrade Cuddles posing with a Soviet flag. Which he tends to sharpen his claws on, on account of the Sino-Soviet Split. Not sure his exact views on that, arguing with him is never worth it when I can have snuggles instead of an argument.

this post was submitted on 06 Aug 2025

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