slapping my dick against my LCD monitor as a substitute for having a relationship with a human being
okay but read this post listening to Jack on the Moon by Carte Blanche AND THEN tell me that isn't a sensuous experience.
She is phasing through that countertop...
Also how is she taking a mirror selfie there?
Do you not have a kitchen mirror?
Unexpected James Acaster
Idk how y'all fuck in the kitchen without kitchen mirror
maybe she's taking a picture of you while you take that picture of her?
Now that's some real intimacy right there!
"Chat with me and we'll become as close as my thighs and this countertop"
also
"For texts hotter than those burners that would make direct contact with your cookware, and are way off-center for some reason..."
I like the sink faucet that points straight up
The saddest part about this to me is that the garbage tagline is clearly also written by AI, like they couldn't even be bothered to explain why you want to buy their stupid thing.
i don't know it reads like a Justyn Pflannerstill original to me
I need to fill out the Andrea Dworkin apology form
Me and my wife are looking for a third
pulls out macbook
Perfect 🤤
love to die in a nightmare
i do not get the appeal. at all. it seems like an activity that would guarantee an increased sensation of disconnection.
also, that looks like 1990s cindy crawford.
Maybe... Maybe it's a honey pot. Anyone who signs up for this is paired with like a therapist and social worker.
For posting all the anonymous reactionary bullshit that you can't post anywhere else.
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