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3. Tater tot: A good tater tot is like butter. Pure salt and crunch then melt in your mouth deliciousness.

4. Onion Rings: Good onion rings is technically better than tater tots, but the spectrum of bad to good onion rings is very wide.

5. Curly Fries: Curly Fries are hard to fuck up. I don't even think I've had a variation of curly fries. They're all the same to me, but they're so good.

6. Wedges: Wedges have a smaller spectrum than onion rings, but the ceiling is lower and they're hard to rank better than the ones ahead of them.

7. Shoestring: McDonalds

8. ZigZag: These can range from heavenly to straight fucking trash. Unfortunately they're too easy to turn into straight fucking trash. By that I mean you have to put more work into them to make them good as opposed to just salt and oven/fried. Might as well just try to fry some snow at that point.

9. Sweet Potato: I've had good sweet potato fries but I rarely get good sweet potato fries.

10. Waffle: I don't get these. They're ass. The only place that makes them kinda tolerable is Chik-Fila, but even then they're still ass to me. Can't even make them good at home without drowning them in salt and ketchup. I can slice up a potato and chuck them in the oven and get better results most of the time.

Edit for formatting. Apparently piefed, doesn't honor your numbering and turns it into 1, 2, 3, etc even if you go 8, 12, 3.

HOW DARE YOU, onion rings are awesome

Where are the cheese curds? Fucking profligates is deep fried cheese too good for ya?

One is not like the others.

My only strong opinion on the whole chart is that crinkle cut fries are the worst thing shown and thus take last place no matter what

I'm gonna have to lock in Onion Rings as my final answer.

What the heck kind of list is this?

Where are the steak fries?

1. Waffle fries (always crispy and delicious)
2. Curly fries (same)
3. Tater tots (surprisingly good)
4. Wedges, if properly spiced
5. Good onion rings
6. Shoestring, if not limp
7. Bad onion rings
8. Bad wedges
9. Crinkle cut (zigzag) (usually unflavored and soggy from a bag, but can be better than soggy shoestrings)
10. Bad shoestrings
11. Sweet potato fries (always soggy and I don't like sweet potato very much)

I'm not too fussy about my deep fried treats. They're all no. 1 in my book. Except sweet potato, they can fuck off. They taste fine, but why are they always soggy?

... are the wedges the only non fried food in this picture?

How about boiling them tatoes?

Or simply pan fry them with some butter?

Anyways; 1. Wedges, 2. Waffles, 3. Shoestring with surprise sweet potatoes > The rest.

1, 7, 6, 4, 8, 3, 2, 5

Doesn't matter which, if its done incorrectly its complete garbage.

Done right, each one, extremely delicious... except maybe sweet potato

5, [tied: 1, 2, 3, 4, 7], 6, 8

Sweet potato fries are fucking amazing when they're done right. Usually they're overly mushy which I think is why they get so much hate, but they're top tier when the cook knows what they're doing.

Anglosphere ah ah list

1. Cheese curds

5 - 8 - 4 - 2 - 1 - 3 - 7 - 6

I'm really not a big white potato fan but sweet potatoes and onions are delicious

The top three are Shoestring, Curly, and Wedges, though not necessarily in that order. I still have not managed to figure out how the fuck restaurants make their shoestring (and steak) fries so fucking good.

Next are waffle fries and onion rings. They're okay.

Sweet Potato fries and tots after that. Just not my thing.

Whoever likes zigzag/crinkle-cut fries is a monster. May god have mercy on their twisted souls.

The secret winner though is zucchini fries, which are mana from the heavens.

list is missing Fried Tofu

since we're apparently just including any random fuckin food you can fry

Never had curlies, tots (not even sure what they are) or waffle fries.
After reading the comments I think I've never had good onion rings or sweet potato fries. Those are a no from me. Onion rings were just deep fried batter and sweet potato was sweet and soggy. Both didn't leave an impresion.

Now my potato of choice is wedges (especially if cooked in an oven). Then whatever is left. Not sure why everyone is hating on zigzags. The thickness is similar to straight fries so it should cook similarly and without seasoning everything will taste bland.

Why not #9?