this post was submitted on 24 Mar 2025
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The online incel community has taken a break from blaming women for their ongoing failures in life to issue a collective tantrum over Netflix’s new drama Adolescence, which dares—dares, mind you—to portray incel culture as the toxic, rage-filled echo chamber it so demonstrably is.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 days ago

Is it actually worthwhile or just another attempt to spark more conflict between men and women?

Because honestly I can hardly see as anything more than a way to profit off demonizing men that I assume already feel abandoned and, correct me if Im wrong, are not getting much support either

May I please get a summary on their take somewhere?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 days ago (1 children)

The life of an incel is very hard...

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 days ago

And to make it worse, you get no help with it

[–] [email protected] 85 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Incel is such an oddly self reinforcing thing. As I recall it the term started as a self identification (I can't get laid, there for am an involuntary-celibate), which ended up with these self ID people declaring someone else is at fault for their situation, then that attitude got so pervasive it became a given term (you can't get laid BECAUSE you're an incel).

Morphing of language and all, similar happened with 'woke'. Either way, if these folks could comprehend a simple fact that the one person you can demand change of is yourself then maybe they could get out of that cycle.

[–] [email protected] 49 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It is a sad story:

When Alana started a website for lonely people struggling to find love, she had no idea it would become linked to a community of hate and anger directed at women, which would ultimately lead to the deaths of several innocent people in her home city.

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[–] [email protected] 67 points 1 week ago (2 children)

“It’s a hit job,” said one Reddit user, who goes by the username DarkMageOfTruth99.

Oh geez I snorted so hard at the username I farted

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[–] [email protected] 62 points 1 week ago (5 children)

Not the onion. Check any of the forums on reddit, like r/mensrights, and they're furious indeed.

I had to explain to someone what the manosphere is, as a result of watching this show together. She had no idea that men were getting radicalized like this.

[–] [email protected] 64 points 1 week ago (7 children)

Imagine if the "manosphere" actually did things like raising awareness for testicular and prostate cancer, teaching men how to be good dads/husbands/sons, how to be financially sensible, how to build a career, etc. instead of blaming all their problems and all the world's problems on women and feminists lmao

[–] [email protected] 68 points 1 week ago (3 children)

The current manosphere is basically a pipeline to the alt-right and additional radicalization. The distance between incel to proud boys is quite small.

The problem is that any attempt to make a pro-men group with any of the positive agendas you list will attract the same people as an audience that are already in the manosphere. And then you have the Nazi bar problem.

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[–] [email protected] 38 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Ironically feminism gets you closer to this than anything they've cooked up over a very long period of time

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 week ago (6 children)

It's exactly why reactionaries have spent decades demonizing feminism: it keeps men defending the patriarchy that damages them too (although not as much as other people).

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[–] [email protected] 51 points 1 week ago (33 children)

I identify as an incel. I don't visit the incel web spaces though and I don't blame women for it.

I'm an incel because I can't afford to date. Like every week I'm barely able to get by living in poverty. Dating takes time and at least some money. If I got a little more of either, I'd have to use it to better my situation before dating.

I bring this point up because, as toxic as incel culture is, I rarely see it tied back to the shitty economy. Just people pointing fingers at each other as though the Male Loneliness phenomenon were entirely the result of people's personalities.

[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 week ago (3 children)

I would stop identifying yourself as an incel. It's more than just being involuntarily celibate and you seem far too well-adjusted.

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You are looking at the etymology of the term "incel" and then assuming that's the actual meaning. But it isn't. Incel culture is not about people who are too poor to date. If it were, they'd be complaining about minimum wage in the next paragraph, right? But that is not what we see.

I see incel culture tied to sexism, selfishness, and often an willingness to try hard. Do we see it waxing and waning together with the economy? I don't think we do, so I don't think it's closely connected.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Yep and a big part of it is blame shifting onto women. The running theme I find in incel subs is that they don't actually do anything about their issues, other than maybe some appearance based work sometimes. They just wallow in blame shifting and self pity

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[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (9 children)

We need a tinder for poor people, those who don't have the economic means to date, but would have their situation bettered by joining forces with one or more like-minded and equally fin-locked partners.

We could call it Prolescroll, PlentyOfRamen, Stumble, econHarmony

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 days ago

It would only have men.

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Tbh at this point calling yourself an incel because you're involuntary celibate is like calling yourself a homophobe because you're scared of gay people. Technically accurate, but do you really wanna go there?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Lmao I had a hard time picturing an actual homophobe but that's funny.

For the example to work, they'd have to be gay allies at the same time, and trying to imagine that is even funnier.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 days ago

"I support the gays as long as they don't come near me 'cos then I shriek and jump on a chair"

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[–] [email protected] 39 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (3 children)

I would call Adolescence a very surface-level view of incel culture. It's fairly accurate, but you'd need a much longer series to truly get the culture across. Contrapoints' video on incels is a really good breakdown of the mindset.

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[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 week ago (13 children)

Adolescence is an incredible and immersive experience. Stephen Graham deserves to be showered with awards for this. It's all about the micro-expressions in his performance.

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[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (15 children)

I had no idea that incel was a term that people used to self-identify.

I thought it was only a slur.

[–] [email protected] 42 points 1 week ago (7 children)

When the term was first coined, it was not an insult. It was from a support group for people who had trouble finding a partner.

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