Johann Kaspar Schmidt ofc
askchapo
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UlyssesT
Richard Pryor, George Carlin, and Bill Hicks.
Mitch Hedberg
I'd make the deal for the Seinigami Eyes, extending my life, and gaining the ability to know everybody's birthdays. That would be very useful.
Anthony Bourdain of course
I would find a list of Lebanese and Gazan martyrs, and do that. Then I would find a list of Soviet soldiers that were martyred during WWII (hopefully to kill more Nazis).
I'm bringing back Meat Loaf, so he can scream at Gary Busey one last time.
I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:
Soviet Union + Stalin and Lenin.