this post was submitted on 18 Jan 2025
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badposting

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badposting is a comm where you post badly


This is not a [email protected] alternative. This is not a [email protected] alternative. This is a place for you to post your bad posts.

Ever had a really shitty bit idea? Joke you want to take way past the point of where it was funny? Want to feel like a stand-up comedy guy who's been bombing a set for the past 30 minutes straight and at this point is just saying shit to see if people react to it? Really bad pun? A homemade cringe concoction? A cognitohazard that you have birthed into this world and have an urge to spread like chain mail?


Rules:

  1. Do not post good posts.
    • Unauthorized goodposting is to be punished in the manner of commenting the phrase "GOOD post" followed by an emoji that has not yet been used in the thread
    • Use an emoticon/kaomoji/rule-three-abiding ASCII art if the rations run out
  2. This is not a comm where you direct people to other people's bad posts. This is a comm where you post badly.
  3. This rule intentionally left blank.
  4. If you're struck for rule 3, skill issue, not allowed to complain about it.

Code of Conduct applies just as much here as it does everywhere else. Technically, CoC violations are bad posts. On the other hand: L + ratio + get ~~better~~ worse material bozo

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 hours ago

I want to return this pez dispenser it only dispensed a dozen treats and now it's not working

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 hours ago

starts jelqing my hog ooouughh im ambout to crank ougghhhh

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 hours ago

i'm buying out the entire store, i hate this place and i want to take away the pleasure of shopping at the dumbass store from other dumbasses. i am the main dumbass anyway

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 hours ago

Kshh shung

"ATTENTION ALL FUCKING DUMBASSES, WE GOT A MANAGER'S SPECIAL ON T SHIRTS ON AISLE NEGATIVE FOUR INCLUDING ALL FLAVORS! COOL RANCH, CHEESE BLASTED, BARBEQUE, GRASS, SWEET CHIPOTLE, AND DIRT. THANK YOU!"

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 hours ago

Wow, you have a huge selection of Funko Pops here

[–] [email protected] 13 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

uuhhh could i get a uhhhh uhhhh could i get a uhhhhhh

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 hours ago

Hey hurry the fuck up I'm on lunch break from my job at the stupid ass factory!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 7 hours ago

Kshh shung

"MAINTENENCE, SOME DUMBASS SPILLED HOT DOG WATER ALL OVER AISLE 5, CAN YOU CLEAN THAT SHIT UP? THANKS, BABE!"

[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Hi, my friend said they got a call from you saying you're "all out of me," does that mean that you, uh, sell copies of me here? And how much are they?

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 hours ago

I put on my robe and wizard hat

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

Do you carry mini-trucking magazine?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 hours ago

nah we only have monster trucking magazine

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 hours ago (2 children)

"Hail be thou, I am looking to purchase one of your toothbrushes, but it needs to be the right size for my teeth. Look!" nage

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 hours ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 hours ago

we don't got grapes. we got "raisins" but they're actually just rat turds. don't tell my boss i told the customers that again

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

"Hey I tried ordering something on your website but it said 'credit card declined', can I speak to the manager of your local franchise to have him fix it?"

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 hours ago

sorry, our Dog Manager Hazel is currently dealing with another customer. Can you please take this to customer service? thank you

[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Is the nincompoop machine still broken? I want a frozen dumb ass.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

yeah the machine is working fine. you want sprinkles on that?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 hours ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 13 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

okay so i put sprinkles on the machine and then it caught fire and broke. no more frozen dumbasses, sorry :(

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 hours ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 hours ago

we got fives over in aisle two

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

whispers quietly can I have a turkey sandwich... And could you uh... Gets quieter take your shoes off and step on my bread

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

uhhhhh FeetMart is about 5 blocks down Oak Street, on the left across from the Denny's

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 hours ago

Oh... Okay... Walks always disappointed and defeated

[–] [email protected] 14 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

Where do you keep the Skub

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 hours ago

uhhhhhh we ran out three months ago and nobody remembered to order any

[–] [email protected] 13 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

I would like...world peace bloomer

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 hours ago (3 children)

yeah we got it on aisle 14

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

Uhhhhhhhh yes I'll have the uhhh the ummm uhhh hmmm one sec uhhh incoherent whispering yeah okay the uhhh hmmm mmm yea...no...nuhhhh hmmm uhhhhh one uhhhh can I make it a large uhhhh hmm or maybe another hmm no I had that last time one second I need a second just uhhh hmmm one ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

oh yeah you work here, don't you?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 hours ago

Uuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

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