this post was submitted on 17 Dec 2024
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Yeah, we doing Facebook-tier ass discussion now. It's my social media of choice as an old bumpkin who doesn't do the Twitter or Tiktoks

If any of you buttholes picks Cena, you're dead to me. Definitely keeping Lithgow but number two is a stumper.

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 5 days ago (3 children)

Leguizamo and Cusack.

Leguizamo:

  • LGBTQ+ rights advocate.
  • Regularly calls out Hollywood's whitewashing casting decisions, e.g., first-time being cast as fidel-wut, and mario / charlie-stare as mario-dance and luigi-dance

Cusack:

  • Called out obama-drone for, well, obama-drone
  • Bernie bro and DSA member (I know, it aged like milk, but for a rich lib? Fuck it, I'll take it)
  • Got the shit beat out of him by Chicago pigs at a George Floyd protest in 2020
  • Pro-Palestine
[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

100% agree

Also Grosse Point Blank is one of my favorite movies.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago

Leguizamo is Pro-LGBTQ+?! luigi-dance

Cusack is pretty good.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

C. Reilly and Goodman. It's a hard choice but I want more Tim & Eric JCR content and I can't give up The Righteous Gemstones. Eagerly awaiting "You can only save two Jons".

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 days ago

Yeah that's the pick for sure

[–] [email protected] 15 points 5 days ago (1 children)

John Brown and John Arbuckle. Obviously.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 5 days ago (3 children)

this is fun and all but can we do one about killing the Pod Jons

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 days ago (1 children)

It's implied that they'll get got in the great johntastrophy.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago

Or they will merge with all of the other Jons in the Jon Instrumentality Project

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Fine but we keep Tommy Vitor

I have no idea what he looks like but I did shamefully listen to Pod Save America on my journey through liberalism, temporary Berniecrat, Chapo, and now baby baby leftist.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Around here we only listen to Trillbillies.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Bob Dylan working the return counter at Patagonia

We gotta take it back

Beat all to hell, but we gotta take it back

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago (1 children)

That was such a fucking incredible bit. I am giggling like an idiot just at you referencing it.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago (2 children)

I've been saying it to myself since I heard it and chuckling multiple times a day

got Sausalito cookies at the grocery store last time too lmao (p good! bit pricey for me for how many you get tho)

"Playin' a show in Sausalitooooo California... Jacob's runnin' the merch table. He asked me, 'pa, can I play the opening set?' and I told him, 'boy you just sit there and sell them tshirts"

michael-laugh

We love our Trillbillies, don't we folks?? a-little-trolling

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago

That Sausalito bit hit me real hard too lmao. I live right near there.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

We don't give a damn. We gotta take it back, put it up on the counter let's have a look at it.

Also the bit about the tinned fish and telling the customer to stick their fingers in their throat to throw up the tinned fish they are returning.

I'm listening to it again just because of this and no matter how many times it still kills me.

Fuckin god tier bit. I've been telling people to listen to them for years and this is possibly the best introductory episode. Tom and Tarence riffing on the ethicist is always peak content.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Somebody needs to upload Trillbilly bits to YouTube like that channel that animates Cumtown bits

the masses yearn for Bob Dylan bits

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 days ago

Which is the John who Dies at the End?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 5 days ago (1 children)

i would pick john cena twice

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 days ago

You had one job and you failed me twice

malcolm-checks

[–] [email protected] 13 points 5 days ago (1 children)

all these johns i don't know and no john-brown

a shameful display

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 days ago

I'm assuming there's actually three Johns allowed and OP correctly feels no one should be able to not choose him

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 days ago

This is the correct answer. Throw the rest straight into the trash

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Do you all see anyone in the panel in the bottom right corner? It looks invisible to me?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago

No, goddamn this eternal subpar joke

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Lithgow, Leguizamo. But losing Goodman makes me a bit sad.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 days ago

And Cusack has some good stuff to say, if I'm remembering correctly. Damn, this is tough. Lucky we're all adults in the room making the hard decisions. I'm just surprised that this chat is binding.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Travolta and Cleese. Would be my answer on who to not save.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

Oooooo, a twist!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago

beating the table, baring my teeth WHERE THE FUCK IS JOHN FETTERMAN I DEMAND JOHN FETTERMAN

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 days ago

I'll save Chef John from Food Wishes Dot Com and then figure out another one from this list.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 days ago

All I know is Cleese is dead

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 days ago (3 children)

What's wrong with Cena? He's done more make-a-wish visits than anyone else.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 5 days ago (1 children)

yeah, afaik john cena has probably done the most good in the world of any public entertainer, steals valor every day, and speaks fluent mandarin shrug-outta-hecks

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 days ago

What? That's cool as shit

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 days ago

He def knew about the Vince McMahon shit and didn't say anything

[–] [email protected] 10 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

ride or die for vince. he def knew

kinda sours the legitimately incredible amount of make-a-wish work

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 days ago

I push Cleese in front of the train or whatever that's threatening the rest of them

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 days ago

The bottom right box is for a write in?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 days ago

Llegiuzamo and yeah I guess Lithgow.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 5 days ago

Left to right, top to bottom: Raul Chamgerlain, Todd Bonzalez, Karl Dandleton, Mike Truk, Willie Dustice, Glenallen Mixon, Bobson Dugnutt, Dwigt Rortugal, Anatoli Smorin and Sleve McDichael

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 days ago

Mortal Kombat character roaster

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago

I don't know who a single one of these people is.

Okay I guess I know they're all John, but you know what I mean.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago

Goodman and Lithgow

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