this post was submitted on 16 Oct 2024
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grimdank

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[–] [email protected] 97 points 1 month ago (2 children)

"Hey babe, come over, we can watch a scary movie for Halloween."

"What movie?"

"Event Horizon."

"Oh, I've never seen it, what's it about?"

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Head canon first warp travel with no gellar field

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

What was that story, there's a creepypasta about the moon or deep oceans or something that was basically "We explored somewhere new, only two crew came back, they refused to say anything besides "don't go back." They were found dead the next day by their own hands"

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I don't know if it was intentional or not but I do know SOMEONE involved with the script has a favorite Space Marine chapter.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Alfa-legion?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Ok so I had to Google half that sentence, so here I am a day later.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

I've been waiting for my kids to be old enough to watch this movie. Once they're all like 16, I'm just gonna hit them with a casual "hey, let's watch this old sci-fi movie" and give them no other details. Mwahahaha

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

I’ve done something similar…
“What are you watching?”
“An old animated movie from my childhood. Just started, want to watch?”
“Sure, what’s it called?”
“The Secret of NIMH”

I still can’t get them to watch The Last Unicorn.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

"I have a movie you're going to love. It's called Return to Oz."

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

“Mr. Simpson, this is the most blatant case of false advertising since my suit against the film 'The Neverending Story'.”

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[–] [email protected] 63 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The Imperium has less political intrigues and sabotage than my wife's work place.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (2 children)

The Imperium in EvE Online might have her workplace beat.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

It truly is impressive how much drama a game about spreadsheets can have.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

I’m pretty sure that IS a workplace.

[–] [email protected] 59 points 1 month ago

I thought I was safe because none of the boys I dated even knew what 40k was, then I dated a girl and SHE taught me about 40k. You're NEVER safe.

[–] [email protected] 45 points 1 month ago (16 children)

Kissing girls doesn’t spare you

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Was going to inquire. Thanks for answering that, Cap.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

Glad to help lol

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Only reason my GF knows anything about 40k because of me is because I used the Mechanicum not knowing the actual technicals of how anything works to set up a joke about me being a software magos because all I do is write endless canticles of the endl semicolon

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

I ensnared my partner by describing the mechanicus as "Evangelical Transhumanists" and then giving her the Flesh and Steel audiobook (which is just a genuinely great piece of scifi all on its own WHEN DO WE GET THE SEQUEL GW PLEASE). Now she's color-coordinating the paint job on her Trayzen and Orikan minis and drunkenly holding court on how the Drukhari are the 'only moral faction'.

~~help me what have I done~~

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (5 children)

If she's defending the morals of the Drukhari I'd start worrying about how much time she spends on certain parts of the internet if I were you.

Specifically the parts of the internet that involve giving her ideas for very not safe for family television things she plans to do to you.

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I am under no illusions that in fact I am the one being kept, but you're very kind nontheless.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Okay I am using that analogy, thank you

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago (4 children)

I've never kissed a boy but at this point I might need someone to get me started on Warhammer, it's scary how big it's gotten & how I don't have any time for even much simpler things.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

sigh

I'm gonna have to take the bullet and tell my girlfriend I'm gonna go kiss a boy because I really want to know more about 40k

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

If anything is understandable, that is.
No subsequent questions should be raised.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (4 children)

I remember when they were doing Lord of the rings Warhammer. That was like 20 years ago. I bought a set, it's still on my shelf unpainted

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

I give it two weeks before you're randomly musing about your desire to die along side Sanguinius in defence of the Eternity Gate.

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Henry Cavill in shreds rn...

Nah. Not really.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

I think she might be misunderstanding the problem. The problem is if he asks if she knows about it and asks if she'd like to talk out hear about it. And TBH if you're not (both) able to half-listen to the other ramble, and not cool with the other doing that, you've got some skills to master before you're ready to commit to a long term relationship. Because I guarantee you, there will always be stuff each of you likes that the other does not. Listening without going crazy is a skill. Just make sure you listen enough to know if they're ranting like a maniac, or you might wake up one day married to a Trump supporter or something.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

If I am ever heald captive I am going to recite 40k lore, I will either spread the infection and make a friend or I wilk get my ass beat and they have to find out how much more annoying I am while concussed.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

What if he doesn't try to teach you about 40k?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

I'm not 100% on the lore but, it may be a sign that they are a heretic.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

She says that like it's a bad thing...

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

Terrifying. Nightmare inducing.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I want to tell her I'm a boy who knows nothing about Warhammer 40k, but I'm afraid that a boy will hear and try to teach me about Warhammer 40k

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