"I'm fucking broke, so can you foot the bill? I promise I'll pay you back when I have money."
this post was submitted on 27 Aug 2024
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chapotraphouse
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They really can't fathom the fact that it's paycheck to paycheck, and what it means to skip meals to keep the lights on. Sorry people suck.
the one and only "destination" wedding I went to was on a weekend, about an 6 hr road trip away. 4 of piled into a car, I only had to drive 2 hours of it. and we all crashed in one room of a big rented beach house the family of the bride had provided and they provided the food for us and drink. the ceremony was a short walk away, "come as you are" on the beach at dusk. it was a long weekend, but I don't think any of us went out of pocket more than $30 total for gas and maybe a rehearsal dinner+drinks type of thing at a chill seafood joint. the haul was a lot, but we were all pretty close, young and eager for a chill road trip to the coast.
I've been to a lot of weddings, but the coolest people always think of making it easier on the community they want to be there and support them.
people who make it about stunting on everyone they know and making a lot of flaunting flash don't have any clue about what brings people together in marriage, friendship, or community and can be safely discarded.
I'm glad I had a small wedding, just me and my spouse and a photographer. Saved a shit ton of money and I can just have dinner with the people I care about instead.
This isn't applicable to your situation - which just sounds wack - but a good rule (which is super fact and situation dependent) when you have a friend group with greater disposable income is to be easy and open handed with money when you have it, even to people who can afford it more than you can. It shows that you aren't a tightwad, and your friends will be more forgiving and open handed with you. It's a really delicate balance though, and depends on your friends, but making sure your friends see you as generous but money deprived is better than them seeing you as a miser.
See Dickens for this trope in spades - the lovable guy who is too generous for his own good is virtuous while the Golden Dustman is wicked.
People will judge you for anything you do or don’t do. Fuck em