this post was submitted on 14 May 2024
464 points (97.5% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

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top 34 comments
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[–] [email protected] 84 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (5 children)

I like my dick thoroughly unguillotined, thank you very much

[–] [email protected] 45 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 74 points 6 months ago (1 children)

That's what the "I" at the beginning stands for. You guillotine yourself as much as you want.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Still counts

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago

How do you know, have you even tried?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I bet you're not even gona fap to that

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago

I wouldn't go that far.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Joke's on you. Twice, and I'm not even done reading the comments.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago

We get it, you're not Jewish.

[–] [email protected] 55 points 6 months ago (2 children)

This article is hilarious and I'm already a gym bunny but the idea that I could snap one off is awakening something weird in me.

[–] [email protected] 42 points 6 months ago

I volunteer as tribute

[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 months ago

But why ;-;

[–] [email protected] 54 points 6 months ago (1 children)

https://reductress.com/post/4-exercises-thatll-make-your-vagina-so-tight-it-becomes-a-dick-guillotine/

For people who don't want to read the article and as a long time practicer, the exercises are kegels, squats, glute bridges, and medicine bell sit-ups.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

I think this is the kind of sensationalist headline I can get behind.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 months ago (1 children)

From the movie Teeth, in case anyone is wondering

[–] [email protected] 24 points 6 months ago

I... was not. But, thank you.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Will these exercises work on the butthole as well? asking for a friend asking for a friend

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

Buttholes are usually pretty strong already

[–] [email protected] 24 points 6 months ago

~~new bottom surgery just dropped~~

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago

just gonna upvote and see myself out

[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I shall resist the urge to google this, to see if it is real...

[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 months ago

*Wench Revolution

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago

Fun fact: It's called a "french kiss" because you're supposed to bite their tongue off.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago

Looks like 'King Richard' is finally gonna be executed boys!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago

Teeth as told by Parisians

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

La Blue Girl vibes.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

Just use vinegar.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

Vive my pants