this post was submitted on 11 Feb 2024
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chapotraphouse
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BDSM is likely going to be a safer porn to watch than vanilla stuff. But you're talking about something with a shit-ton of rules (if it's done right) and a community that is more likely to be showing off their stuff willingly.
A lot of the theory and practice around positive, informed, active consent that I've learned over the years I learned from people in the BDSM scene. The good folks in that scene understand it and take it extremely seriously. Like no matter how vanilla the sex is, I always talk about safe words with people first, and check in regularly, because its a useful tool to have even if you never need to use it. And I learned that from hanging out with BDSM people.