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Boomer mom inherited a house that was paid for, immediately did a reverse mortgage to fund her lifestyle.
Fuck you, mom.
When people pass on generational wealth, I read its usually gone within 3 generations.
Probably not true for billionaire level wealth, but for the people that work up millions or tens of millions.
The worst part, the absolute worst part, is that it's a house my grandmother designed and my great grandmother financed.
4 generations of my family have lived there, and it will be gone when mom kicks off.
Have you tried bootstrap pulling? I hear that's a great way to make an extra million or two.
My wife's grandparents and their parents were very very wealthy but my mil and her siblings have literally waited every cent of it and im talking millions of dollars. One aunt is a forever student, she has never had a job, never earned her own money in any way and has constantly used money for her own education while never earning any degrees. One uncle spent the vast majority on gambling and alcohol.
Some people actually like being perpetual students, but to not earn any degrees while doing that is crazy. Like, get PhD or 2 if you want to spend forever in school and if you ever get bored of it then you'd have something to use. Also if you're good at it, you can even get scholarships or grants along the way.
Ya thats not what she did. She just took classes that sounded interesting and never got anything to show for it. Being a full time student would be fun but not at the expense of fucking over everyone else.
I think it's true at all levels. Dropping from billionaire to millionaire isn't as sympathetic though.
That's usually because often the second generation grew up seeing and learning (and possibly expereincing) the work that initially generated that wealth.
The 3rd generation only saw and experienced the lifestyle that comes with already having the wealth, and doesn't really have an innate understanding of what it took to generate it.
You'd think knowing this trend is persistent and why, that most people with generational wealth would set up trusts so it couldn't be destroyed.
Here, Iive a lifestyle with this perpetual allowance that probably gets persistently better as the wealth grows.
But i guess people just trust their children too much.
The Chinese even have an idiom for this exact phenomenon, the saying goes, "富不过三代". Translated literally, it says wealth does not persist beyond three generations.
Wow that's crazy they got something specific for it
Wouldn't it just be because it's divided among all their great grand children and spouses? If everyone had 4 children, the wealth would be divided 4^3=64 times. So, $1 million becomes $15k (assuming none is spent by the first 2 generations).
It was talking about wealth levels where passing it down to your children wouldn't kill it. (Edit 1 million is a lot of money, but at the same time it's not a lot of money. In many places its not enough to live a comfortable life off with a family indefinitely)
Like you have 40 mil and 3 children and give to those 3.
13.3 mil is with a very safe 3.5% withdrawal is 465.5k a year for each child to spend. At 3.5% that wealth will probably become much larger and be able to grow indefinitely as it's below the 4% safe rule.
By the time you die it could be 30-50 mil or more and you then give it to your kids. You maintained the generational wealth and passed it on
But instead these children are spending it poorly and they each die with 4 million.
That's still over a million each for each child of the child, even with 3 kids each, and each of those kids could probably turn it back into generational wealth but then they also spend it poorly.
My parents had a VERY nice house and decided to spend unwisely. They lost the house and all the equity in it, then bought a smaller house. They have since wasted every penny they have ever earned on random shit that they can acquire for their back yard. My parents could have put everyone through college or made a down payment on a house but decided instead to just spend and spend.
Paying it forward
Genuine question: why do you think you're entitled to the house?
Because it was in the family for 2 generations before mom. My grandmother designed it, and my great grandmother financed it.
It was their desire it stay in the family. Ideally, when mom died, it should have gone to my sister, if we're maintaining a matrilinear line.
Jasmine?
Nope! Weird that I do KNOW a Jasmine though?
Your sister? In Milford?
Nope, one of my kid's friends.
Ah well she has the same story as you.
Wouldn't surprise me, Boomers gonna Boomer.
Thanks for responding! If the home is owned by your mother, isn't she allowed to do with it what she wants? Or was there some sort of plan set in place that she's now reneging on?
I'm not very familiar with generational wealth or the processes by which it's established so I apologize if I'm coming off as ignorant or if what I'm asking is too personal (grew up incredibly poor and I thought this stuff was, like, a movie plot more than anything else).
At any rate, thanks again for your response!
There WAS a plan, but it went out the window when my grandmother died and the house transferred to my grandfather. He was a bundle of bad ideas.
You asked a fair question and were kind about it and people still think you have to be downvoted... I guess those people are entitled to their vote
They have about as much of a claim on the house that their mother did anyway
The mother had a claim because the house was literally given to her, which was the right of it's previous owner.
This person has no claim.
If the previous owners wanted it to remain with the family line they should have formalized that by placing the house in a trust.
Yes legally you are correct. The mother legally did inherit the home and has no obligation to share any of that windfall with her adult children. The grandparents didn't put in any legal requirements that the house not be sold/scammed away from in a reverse mortgage scheme.
My point wasn't about the legality of the situation just refuting the implied point from the original replay, that while OP did nothing to be entitled to an inheritance, neither did their mother.
Pulling up the ladder on your way up is a generally shitty thing to do.
We've set up a society where your success in life is heavily dictated by generational wealth. It's not fair, but that's the game, so not passing on generational wealth while enjoying the generational wealth passed on to you is greedy.
FYI, based on your follow-up comment, this wasn't a "genuine question" it was more of a self-serving opportunity to impart your beliefs and opinions onto someone else. It's a bad look, regardless of the shitty opinion you shared. Just thought you might want to know
This is quite the presumptuous take, almost a self-serving opportunity to impart your opinion onto someone else. Just thought you might want to know
You're welcome to your opinion, but what makes it presumptuous?
Genuine question: why do you think that the mother is more entitled to the house than OP? Neither of them paid for it.
your comment exists only to be edgy/angry and project your own internal weirdness.