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submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) by kristina@hexbear.net to c/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns@hexbear.net

All of these guys tend to be younger, it seems to be a new trend cause we didn't have issues like this 10 years ago. They'll come in, talk only to other gay guys, and exclude women (incl trans women) from all conversations to the point it becomes very awkward. This has happened 3 times in the past 2 years or so. We had an event recently and we had a handful of trans people show up. I tried to talk to everyone to just say hi (I'm the organizer after all) and the guy just stared at me?? Then one of the sweetest trans ladies there talked to me about how she was trying to get contact details for people so we could, y'know, be a community, and the guy apparently told her that all of his chats and local groups for trans men were men only and that they had so many issues with trans women trying to make LGBT spaces all about them so they only let trans men in. She was just looking for people to hang out with! The lack of solidarity here was shocking to me.

Maybe it's some social media thing? Over compensation? Idfk. Shits getting weird.

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[-] SerialExperimentsGay@hexbear.net 13 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Patriarchy isn't something that just happens because of some evil hormone, gene, or DNA.

Somebody always constructs the bioessentialism strawman in this kind of discussion, even though literally nobody has blamed testosterone or chromosomes.

It happens through a complex society structure that enforces it.

No, it happens because men are using a complex social structure for the subjugation of women and all other non-men for its intended purpose. For subjugation. They use patriarchal modes of opression to extract labor, to violate, to silence. Patriarchy doesn't just happen. People actively practice it, people derive material benefit from it, and other people suffer from that because we are exploited, undervalued, used and pushed aside.

Trans men are not inherently more prone to patriarchy then anyone else. Given certain types of feminism likes to ignore the truth of women especially white women who uphold it themselves. (This has been studied to death).

Patriarchy, famous for its gender neutrality. Do you hear yourself talk? Yes, i get it, there are women that participate in patriarchy. Patriarchal structures can be used by women to hurt other women, and they are used this way. And yes, white women use it to hurt women of color. Cis women use it to hurt trans women. Trans women use it to hurt other trans women. All of that is true.

But none of that changes that patriarchy is, at its core, a system that allows men the opression of women.

Why do you have to distort the nature of patriarchy like this? Why do you have to completely obfuscate who it materially benefits the most? Because these women who collaborate with men to uphold patriarchy aren't the ones who get the most out of it, they are still below men that share their class, race, etc. A white woman who becomes a class collaborator in the system of gendered class violence and upholds patriarchy exchanges servitude to white men for the limited privilege of ruling over women of color. She is still relatively marginalized even when she upholds patriarchy. She participates in a system that exists for the benefit of men.

And on top of that, it is blatantly obvious who commits the majority of patriarchal violence. It's men. And they mostly harm women and other people who aren't men.

this post was submitted on 06 Aug 2026
71 points (100.0% liked)

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