What is your least favourite thing about dating or romantic relationships? (feddit.uk)

submitted 1 day ago by Gentryfried@feddit.uk to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world

61 comments fedilink hide all child comments

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[-] volore@scribe.disroot.org 11 points 1 day ago

every year I get a little older, a little more damaged, and a little less desirable; and the age bracket of people I'd be interested in get more baggage of their own and have more expectations of a potential partner. I'm in my late 20s living with family, and nobody really wants to date me already; I can't fathom that will improve any in the future being a 30-something living with family (as I will likely still be too poor to leave).

Probably gonna die alone. Can't wait, this place sucks anyhow.

[-] RBWells@lemmy.world 6 points 23 hours ago

Looking at late 20s as old blows my mind. I looked at a genealogy site and so many of my ancestresses married in their late 20s. I was surprised by that but apparently it's never been uncommon. My mom too, she married around age 30.

[-] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 2 points 18 hours ago

late 20s is when a lot of my friends gave up on what they thought were their ideal partners and ended up happy with people they never considered in the past.

[-] volore@scribe.disroot.org 3 points 22 hours ago

yeah no I haven't even managed to lose my v-card or really even have a meaningful romantic relationship, about the closest I came was someone leading me on and playing mind games with me for a few months. 🙃

Given my success so far, it's easy to extrapolate "when will I find the one?" to "probably never".

[-] Gentryfried@feddit.uk 2 points 19 hours ago

This is unsolicited advice so feel free to ignore, especially if it sounds "twee."

What i think helps is:

having a positive mindset, because it's almost like people can sense when you are yearning to get into a relationship
in the same vein, treat potential mates as potential good friends. Your first few meetings with them is like their "informal interviews for being a friend." You can invite them on a date (or just to do something together as friends)^1^ which is the final interview, which lets them get the higher position in your social circle.
I don't say that to complicate what should already be simple; firstly, it's getting not simple in this day age, because people don't know what to do with all the dating apps and SM. Secondly, the message is just create a more relaxed low pressure atmosphere for them
to revisit the first point - this is just something many people say, and i have experienced in my own life: stop seeking a partner and one will stumble into your life. This might be why people already committed relationships get a lot of attention; they seem self satisfied.

I also just want to say that more people are in your position than you think ❤️. Zoomed are the most sexless and relationship generation, after all.

[-] volore@scribe.disroot.org 3 points 17 hours ago* (last edited 17 hours ago)

Yes, actually I've ceased actively looking for a partner for the better part of a year now. Little has changed, except I now have fewer apps on my phone. (I do still maintain one dating profile on an open source app but I check it on the order of twice a year because the app is dead, feel free to guess which)

More room for memes is cool, I guess

also I've tried solicited advice and it rarely helps either, so I don't really care. It's on me whether I follow it, and terrible advice is usually not subtle to everyone reading in a public forum. Do your worst, none of us are getting any younger.

[-] Gentryfried@feddit.uk 1 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago)

Oh my, I actually thought people got less picky when they went longer without getting married. Mixed messages I suppose.

i’m in my late 20s living with family, and nobody really wants to date me already

There'll be more people in the same situation soon, if that's any consolation. I'm living with my family during uni and might even be stuck here for a while afterwards.

this post was submitted on 31 Jul 2026

54 points (100.0% liked)

Ask Lemmy

40686 readers

592 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions

Rules: (interactive)

1) Be nice and; have fun

Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, toxicity and dog-whistling are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them

2) All posts must end with a '?'

This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?

3) No spam

Please do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.

4) NSFW is okay, within reason

Just remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].

5) This is not a support community.

It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.

6) No US Politics.

Please don't post about current US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world or !uspolitics@lemmy.world

7) No Hit-and-Run questions.

Please don't delete your post for no apparent reason. If you plan on deleting a question later, say so in the post, or if you feel that you have a good reason to remove it, message a mod beforehand. It's not fair to the ones who took their time to answer, and it's not in the spirit of the community.

Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.