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this post was submitted on 06 Jul 2026
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Chapotraphouse
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No anti-nautilism posts. See: Eco-fascism Primer
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When I was a kid, I lived in an area that was a weird test market for new products from RC Cola. At some point, they tried to introduce a more "extreme" successor to Sun Drop to compete with Mountain Dew/Mello Yello and, more directly, Surge. It was called Kick, and my non-citrus enjoyer peers often described it as having the worst qualities of Dew, Mello Yello, and Sun Drop:
I remember getting hold of a 20 ounce plastic bottle of the stuff that should have failed quality control or something, because some kind of bottling plant runoff (likely dried syrup chunks) had wound up in the bottle and gotten re-dissolved by the citric and carbonic acids. I never made it past taking a single whiff of that horrid shit, but I kept it in the back of my car for emergencies (because you never know when you might need to dare one of your dumbass teenage friends into drinking something probably not fit for human consumption. We didn't have a lot of drug dealers around, OK?). It became known as The Vile Kick. It must have sat in the back of that car for a total of around a year and a half, with at least two takers that tried a swig on a bet and learned new depths to the phrase "instant regret."
If that stuff came back, eh, I'd probably fall for the millennial chungus nostalgia bait. Especially if they figured out a zero sugar formulation.
This post is so fucking funny. "This shit is nasty, horrible disgusting stuff and I would absolutely buy it if they brought it back" makes me laugh every time.
"Whatever, I'd still drink that garbage"
All time great post comrade