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Trans Megathread from November 24th, 2025 to November 30th, 2025 (hexbear.net)
submitted 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) by to c/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns@hexbear.net
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Esther Rose - Wanton Way of Loving

Boulevard Montmartre - Night by Camille Pissarro / La Vie en Rose - Louis Armstrong

Tracey Chapman - Fast Car

Elvis - If I Can Dream

Huangguoshu Waterfall

Pang Xunqin - 1940

Owl on a Pine Branch (1833)

Utagawa Hiroshige

Boston Cremes (1962) - Wayne Thiebaud

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[–] 9 points 9 months ago* (4 children)

I guess it would bother me if someone was saying I look like a dude on a day where I only identitified as "she/her."

Why is this? It seems like it would be because you're being called compared to a masculine noun on a day where it defies your identity. Is there really much difference between one being told they look like a dude vs being called a dude.

If it would bother you to be called a dude, then your understanding of that word doesn't seem to be that gender neutral

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  • [–] 2 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (3 children)

    I think someone saying it to say "hey, you..." to me, or "omg" or "woah" is different than when they mean "you look masculine." Those are some of the different ways I hear the word dude. Usage matters.

    I think I don't understand genderfluidity for others in this way. I know some people that do not go by she/he pronouns exist, but I only understand having she/he/they all at once. If there are resources or experiences you guys can share about being genderfluid and not going by either she or he that'd probably help me understand a better picture of how other people's genderfluidities can work.

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  • [–] 6 points 9 months ago* (2 children)

    Why not just say "hey, you," "omg," or "woah"? These are all perfectly gender neutral phrases. What we're objecting to is using a very gendered word in place of gender neutral phrases and pretending like the word suddenly becomes gender neutral. Dude is a gendered word, and using it in place of gender neutral phrases, especially to someone who is not a dude, is exactly what is meant by "man by default" language

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