The Onion

6032 readers

202 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 3 years ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

686

MAGA fans preparing to storm St. Peter’s Basilica should Trump lose conclave (newsthump.com)

submitted 1 week ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

37 comments fedilink hide all child comments

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 days ago (4 children)

???? Is he even a candidate?

[–] [email protected] 59 points 6 days ago (1 children)

you just ate the onion

[–] [email protected] 21 points 6 days ago (1 children)

In this case I get it. I really get it.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 days ago

Yeah, we do live in the darkest timeline

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 children)

Fun fact if he was baptized as a catholic he is eligible.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

Yes, there is precedent. Some random Catholic who wasn't even a priest got selected after a conclave had been stuck in political deadlock for literal years. He couldn't actually take the job till he was ordained, which he did. He immediately instituted a bunch of rules including locking them away together with no luxuries until a decision was made to make sure that problem didn't happen again. (It happened again multiple times anyway.)

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Just checked: this is real....

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

Soy fascism is what you get when you don't have a legion of traumatized soldier coming back for a world war.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 days ago

Psst, check out the comm name