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I didn't mean for this post to cause a bunch of arguing in the comments =(
I thought this was just some gallows humor (e.g. "Everything's lovely except that I have to fear for my safety all the time") type of shitpost that sounded similar to comments I've heard from women irl a lot.
You are not alone in feeling that. Everyone being angry about this in here probably feels the same. And it's incredibly ingenuine to on one hand say this post communicates feelings about fear of going outside and/or men, while simultaneously dismissing feelings of anger at being called a murderer.
My own comment being dismissive of this post (because it's a shitpost, that's the literal community here) was deleted.
Another one where I say "women lie" is being downvoted and it was (softly) implied I'm a murderer for saying this (The comment says "You are the man we are afraid of", context is "men like to murder" as of the OP). The reply and votes to the "women lie" one means people do in fact notice that an overgeneralization hurts. They just don't care if it hurts men. Presumably because "men are murderers" and are thus not allowed a voice besides belittling themselves.
It's just sad.
the difference is your generalization isn't based in statistical fact. women who lie about false rape accusations (i assume that's what you're trying to get at here) are such an unfathomably small minority that no man ever has to live their life considering it. by saying that this is something women in do in equivalence to what women are saying men do, you're implying otherwise and implying the authenticity of countless women's experiences with sexual violence at the hands of men is invalid. experiences which are already seldom believed by the people who need to hear it.
on the other hand, a substantial amount of women experience sexual violence from men. it's statistically common enough that women have to live in fear and that conventional wisdom has long held that women should not go out at night alone, carry mace, etc. etc. etc.
bottom line is, it's a false equivalency that serves only to invalidate the reality women must face, and what you're trying to equate it to is that reality. you are harming women by doing this.
it does not harm men to point out what a significant enough amount of them to be dangerous to women at large are doing. you are not personally affected by women saying that men are violent or murderers, but women are personally affected by your exaggerated claims of dishonesty when they speak out against this violence that they are statistically far more likely to experience.
This is sexism. This woman didn't say "too bad recites national murder statistics exist." She said men.
When you make a sweeping statement about women being dishonest in their accusations, this is unfounded. Men are statistically extremely unlikely to be falsely accused of sexual violence by a woman. A man does not need to consider women to be a potential threat.
When you make a sweeping statement about men being violent against women, this is not unfounded. Women are statistically very likely to experience violence from men. That doesn't mean all or even a majority of men, but enough that women have to consider men to be a potential threat.
By trying to equate the two, you serve only to dismiss the credibility of very often real experiences from women. This harms women very much, especially in a society where they're already seldom believed by the people who need to hear them, such as the authorities.
It is not sexism toward men to point out that men are the ones committing violence against women specifically, it's a fact backed up by evidence. She said men because it's not a woman who is realistically going to be a threat to her. Men ≠ all men. Also, the national murder statistics point to men specifically being the problem so I hardly see what the difference is.
If this woman said "too bad black people exist." Would you rush to defend her with statistics. Stop being a hypocrite injustice is injustice doesn't matter who does it or who they do it against.
I made a reply to blind3rdeye where I mirrored some of your sentiments. I have a hard time finding mutual empathy with people. When anyone talks about the unique pain of belonging to certain groups I try my hardest to trust them. I do this because of how much dismissiveness there is of men's issues.
the thing is, nobody here is being dismissive of men's issues, because this thread is not a conversation about men's issues. men are coming in here and dismissing women's issues.
you guys never seem to talk about this on your own accord, but rather only when it's to bring down women for talking about the realities they face. it makes it difficult to believe that any of you here sincerely care about what you claim to.
You are under a comment about my experience and feelings. I am a man. These are my feelings as a man. People are very publicly dismissing them. You can't just banish injustices towards people you don't want to think about away to somewhere else.
E: that said a mod eventually will show up and do just that
yes, a comment about your experiences and feelings as a man under a thread about women's experiences. i'm staying on the topic hand.
i shouldn't have to explain to you why going "okay but what about men" every time women talk about their experiences is problematic and dismissive.
My comment is about the woman blaming men for being scared to go out at night. It's directly related to the topic at hand. I am dismissive not of this woman's experience, that is being scared to go out at night, but of her claim that this is men's fault. I think men are right to be pissed at being blamed for this.
I get that. I found myself on the side of vegans after a post mocked them for being a vegan while the nature they're protecting is not, and comments then clowning on the vegans that showed up. "How do you know they're vegan? They'll tell you." Kind of stuff. I'm not vegan but I really don't like this kind of baiting.
My comments were way better received then.
I like what you wrote in the other comment, btw.