this post was submitted on 09 Oct 2024
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Star Wars Memes
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Hello there. Somehow, Star Wars memes have returned. It's not a trap, this is where the fun begins.
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This was the moment I checked out of the prequels. Vader, as a child, built C-3PO? I'm supposed to continue suspending my disbelief, now? Impossible.
Definitely one of my least favorite aspects of them. Everyone must get a backstory, and they must all be interrelated. The galaxy's a small place apparently.
Story takes place in a whole-ass galaxy. Everyone winds up back on Tatooine for some stupid reason; the planet with barely one ecosystem, practically zero vegetation, no economy that matters, yet populated with two (?) cities. Other planets also have exactly one ecosystem, culture, and one optional urban center^1^. There's also only 12 or so planets that matter, yet half of everyone you meet are from all the other ones. You may not like what you see, but this is peak sci-fi writing performance, right here. /s
This story could take place in a diverse corner of a single Earth-like planet and it wouldn't be all that different.
^1^ - Meanwhile planet Coruscant is an urban center where the ecosystem can best be described as "traffic" and the culture is "city folk that inexplicably eat at 1950's-style diners".
Single-biome planet is a quite common trope in "science fiction" (tvtropes warning)....
It's really funny when you think about it. Nearly all movie planets are actually real places on Earth, from Tatooine (Tunisia) to Endor (Washington IIRC).
Even funnier, a lot of low-budget alien planets (especially the rocky sceneries) are found within a 30 mi radius of Hollywood or whatever the actor guild considers a long distance shoot.
Exactly this.
Why was Tattooine featured SO MUCH in a galaxy of planets?
Because Star Wars was based on Dune
Even Frank Herbert would have suggested adding more planets.
Maybe C3PO was a kit. Like a gay robot Lego set for ages 5-12. Those Jawas can sell practically anything.
He built it out of junk. Most of internal components were prolly cherry picked and then maaaybe fixed up a bit. Sheesh. Like, kiddo may have been good at soldering, so he fixed a few electronic parts.
There are other bots we see exactly like 3po so clearly not much custom work
This is my favorite theory. I mean, I'm not a star wars historian deep in debate, buffet plate at Bennigan's, but I like to think I know my stuff.
Gotta make the money, credit's no good. When the Jawas run the shop in your neighborhood
Not when, in a universe known to contain non-organic beings able to perform tasks like smuggling plans, a gunnery officer decided to save lasers (as though they were apparently a precious resource) and not fire on an escape pod with no life signs? I feel like that would be the most appropriate moment to stop taking Star Wars seriously.
It's okay to accept it's got a bunch of plot holes and enjoy it for what it is: grungy WWII fighter pilots/samurai/wizards/Vietnam war allegory in space.
Edit: also nukes
You need to treat the empire like a corporation. They do tons of dumb shit lol
Right? And Luke leaving behind a prosperous moisture farming career to go fight baddies? Um, no thank you. Know your audience, Lucas.
I see you fellow dadder
Look, that dog is making fresh Dilithium Crystals - someone get a bag!
I don't think he's supposed to have designed it or anything. I think it's an existing model, and he just scrounged for scrap to put him together. It's basically the thing he's known for as a child. His pod racer seems a little more unbelievable, right?
Not that he couldn't have put together a droid, but that he put this very specific, very integral-to-later-events one together himself. It's ludicrously coincidental.
it’s very synchronous rather than causal. i don’t think the rhetoric and messaging of the original star wars was for you. if you’re familiar with the concepts and ideas that went into star wars in the first place then, at least imo, it’s a very natural plot turn that threepio was himself built by vader. yes, the story revolves around anakin in this grandiose and cosmic way. that’s a feature, not a bug.
Hence why star wars is a chosen one, hero's quest, prophetised fantasy. Not a Sci fi.
When you and your kin are all prophetised to do important shit, there is no coincidence. it's all part of a bigger divine plan of fate. Or it's the midi-chlorians or something I dunno, I slept through the prequels.
Mine was Padme dressing in BDSM gear around the incel monk with an obvious crush on her, and then saying he made her uncomfortable when he started creeping on her
Generally I think women should be able to wear what makes them feel pretty/empowered/safe without getting creeped on, but goddamn, read the room chica!
Also, "I hate sand". Kenobi H Christ, it's awkward
The whole Anakin-Padme romance was just awful. Weird Al's line in The Saga Begins:
sums up the absurdity quite well.
Its a five year gap. When their young, its no good. But once they're both in their 20s, who cares?
It is weird/creepy that they included it so blatently in the first movie with the kids. A real 9 year old would have showed her his toy dino collection and a real teenager would have to play along while despretly looking for an escape route.
We can't be together, I'm a senator!
What. When was Padmé in BDSM gear?
It's hyperbole, but inspired by this outfit
BDSM Padmé
I'm not sure it is hyperbole.
"If you're going to insist on existing while being so hot, don't be surprised if I break my solemn vows, and possibly kill a bunch of kids and sand people. Okay? It's your fault really."
This confused me as well so I googled it.
Padmé in BDSM gear
First result
Yikes
That's what you're supposed to do, though. They're fun space cowboy movies. Anybody who gets upset about the prequels being cheesy or having plot holes is just remembering the originals through rose-colored lenses.
Revolutionary for the time, sure, but the fact that some of it didn't work in spite of the level of ambition is (for me, at least) part of the charm.
Hold on hold on. You trying to argue that the prequels are the same quality as the originals, that’s just batshit crazy. The revisionism these last years about the prequels because all the kids who were born right around then and grew up watching them is wild. They are not good movies. Sure there’s stuff to like and anyone can find enjoyment in nostalgia, but to say the originals are just as bad and it’s only rose colored glasses is just wrong.
Not just as bad, but bad in a lot of the same ways.
"The 3PO-series protocol droid, also known as the 3PO-series protocol unit, was a model of protocol droid produced by Cybot Galactica sometime prior to the Invasion of Naboo. They were equipped with a TranLang III communication module, and as a result were fluent in over 6 million forms of communication. C-3PO was an example of this model, though he was rebuilt out of spare parts. TC-series protocol droids appeared similar to 3PO units."
Wookieepedia
There are a ton of 3PO-series droids in the Star Wars universe.
Vader would not look at a 3P0 droid and think "maybe that's the droid I built as a child and left on a plant in the outer rim"
Same with R2-D2
It's just for the movie sake that there aren't 30 CP0s and 50 R2-D2 units running around in the background. "Wait did Biggs just get R2 in his x-wing?" No, it's some completely different droid I've never seen. Some things have to be adapted for the movie.
As for difficulty, no harder than building like a PC. If there are a ton of CP0 units, he simply takes working parts from a dozen broken ones and pieces them together. He's a child, they fib and stretch the truth. He could have just attached new legs to the unit that needed only legs and then went through the setup process of "programing" him.
He didn't Tony Stark C3P0. He pieced together a robot from pre-made CP0 scrap parts.
And according to other posts in here, they're sentient, and property. And they let kids build them. He also happened to build the one that would be partially responsible for his downfall years later. Star Wars. The universe that keeps on giving.
Anakin was able to build this in a cave! With a box of scraps!
Suspend it and buy the merch!