AI use at my company is now mandatory. We all have gotten really expensive Claude of ChatGPT licenses and (apparently) it's being monitored whether we actually use them. For while I've resisted, telling everyone I don't touch that shit with a ten-foot pole. Now I just write the occasional non-invasive prompt ("check for spelling errors in the comments" or "format the buffer so that all lines have less than 80 columns) just so someone can report to the c-suite that our department is using AI.

Meanwhile I have to do code reviews on patches that have been actually written by a chatbot and doing that takes sometimes as long as writing the whole fucking code from scratch.

But hey, style guidelines are out the window too because the slop machine can't follow them consistently anyway and apparently fixing that shit manually is too much to ask. So at least I never have to fight anyone again over indentation and braces.

I can't comprehensively express how much I despise what Discord has done to the internet. Support communities are gone from the open web (as in, you can't use a search engine to search Discord servers, neither can you easily log them to processable text files like you can with IRC), tons of communities are now insulated to a point where you can't even get in if you want to, because unless you're large enough or have enough booster points (which, to no one's surprise, cost money, and only last for a limited time) you can't generate permanent invite links, so you gotta know someone to get in.

And all of that for a proprietary app that is an accessibility nightmare (for fuck's sake let me change that ugly-ass font to something readable, because God forbid that one of your users might be dyslexic, you absolute munted dickheads), doesn't listen to any user feedback but is constantly adding absolute bottom-of-the-barrel features, many of which are behind a paywall, and is now adding LLMs to the mix?

Okay, rant over, but I just needed to get that out.

That was a great read.

The point of all of this is to say: the tech utopia fantasy is truly dead to me. The image of the cool, hippie, leftist Silicon Valley tech is wrong.

I feel this in my soul, because I was that leftist hippie who got into tech because he believed all this shit and getting disillusioned over time was just fucking painful and made me hate those goons with a passion.

The straw I have left is that I’m not alone and that more people realize this and we make our own communities again that don’t suck. There’s still a long way to go, and Fedi has its own problems, especially when it comes to kick out the racists, sexists, and other bigots, but I try to stay positive that we’ll get there. At least to a degree.

(I mean, we have Awful and it’s an example that you can keep the bar nazi-free if you want to.)

Quick personal sneer: I just had a call with a company trying to sell us their SaaS password/secrets manager solution because we're trying to force everyone to use one instead of using hunter2 everywhere.

Anyway, after going on for 30 minutes about their amazing integrations with every platform on the planet and their super duper security and how their systems are rock solid and never fail, the marketing dude finished off by trying to sell ChatGPT integration as a feature. Not for actual passwords, thank fuck, but in order to quickly produce integrations between their APIs and other systems. He proudly proclaimed that "Usually there's no security issues with just copy-pasting the code from ChatGPT."

Usually.

My favorite bullshit test is to have the AI count letters. Something as simple as "How many A's are in this sentence?" will have the thing give you a seemingly random number (which might sometimes even be correct), but as soon as you ask it to list them, it will have a stroke and just make up stuff that makes no sense.

I can't be arsed to make an account with OpenAI or whatever, so here's an example with Bing Chat, but this has worked on every single chatbot I've tested it on.

Another fun test (as suggested by @flizzo last time I brought this up) is to have the chatbot attempt to crack a simple code. Just Caesar cipher something and ask it to crack it. Hilarity will ensue. You can even ask it to encrypt it first and then to crack it for extra fun.

Me: Encrypt the sentence "I am a stupid roided Clippy" with the Caesar cipher.

Clippy: [After explaining what the Ceasar cipher is, which I didn't ask for, thanks] Convert the sentence to uppercase: “I AM A STUPID ROIED CLIPPY”. Let’s apply the Caesar cipher to your sentence using a shift of 7.

• ‘I’ becomes ‘P’
• ‘A’ becomes ‘H’
• ‘M’ becomes ‘T’
• …
• ‘Y’ becomes ‘F’

So the encrypted sentence is: “PH HT H ZBHTLW YVPLUU”. 😊

Okay, first of all, it dropped a letter. And the shift isn't even correct, lol. It said Y becomes F and then does whatever the fuck.

Okay, so let's give it an easy example, and even tell it the shift. Let's see how that works.

This shit doesn't even produce one correct message. Internal state or not, it should at least be able to read the prompt correctly and then produce an answer based on that. I mean, the DuckDuckGo search field can fucking do it!

This is brilliant and I’m saving it and will post a link to it the next time someone at work asks why we can’t “just use AI to do it” when a ticket gets rejected for being stupid and/or unreasonable.

However:

The first is that we have some sort of intelligence explosion, where AI recursively self-improves itself, and we're all harvested for our constituent atoms […]. It may surprise some readers that I am open to the possibility of this happening, but I have always found the arguments reasonably sound.

Yeah, I gotta admit, I am surprised. Because I have not found a single reasonable argument for this horseshit and the rest of the article (as well as the others I read from their blog) does not read like it’s been written by someone who’d buy into AI foom.

Proof that pasta doesn't exist:

• An atom isn't pasta.
• Adding an atom to something that isn't pasta doesn't make it pasta.
• Therefore nothing is pasta.

Oh look, Elon openly snuggling up to Nazis and "just asking questions". As if I didn't hate this clown enough.

(For anyone out of the loop: the AfD is a far-right political party in Germany and the spiritual successor to the NSDAP. They're praising the SS, advocate for legalization of holocaust denial and historical revisionism, removal of hate crimes from the code of law, and more. They're so openly Nazis that they got kicked out of the EU parliament's far-right ID coalition for being too fucking Nazi. There's no leeway. They're literal card-carrying national socialists.)

Many will point out that AI systems are not yet writing award-winning books, […]

Holy shit, these chucklefucks are so full of themselves. To them, art and expression and invention are really just menial tasks which ought to be automated away, aren’t they? They claim to be so smart but constantly demonstrate they’re too stupid to understand that literature is more than big words on a page, and that all their LLMs need to do to replace artists is to make their autocomplete soup pretentious enough that they can say: This is deep, bro.

I can’t wait for the first AI-brained litbro trying to sell some LLM’s hallucinations as the Finnegans Wake of our age.

Ilya Sutskever also sings AGI chants in the lab and continues to suck major VC dick together with Altman to get more of that sweet moolah to keep developing their chatbots.

Even though he’s apparently very concerned about extinction risks.

In other news, please give me money so I can build a nuke in my basement, which might be powerful enough to blow up the planet, and I’m very concerned it will, trust me, I totally am, but don’t forget to give me money because otherwise I can’t build that nuke that I’m very honestly concerned about.

Also that nuke might be slightly sentient if you squint.

The wort part is that I really can't tell if the text on that page was written by spicy autocomplete or some marketing clown who's freebasing coke before lunch.

Experience the ultimate skill mastery like being plugged into a Matrix-like machine!

They didn't even watch the movie, did they?

I am convinced at this point that Sora is an unfinished mess and the only reason they pushed it out the door is because they needed money.

Didn’t Sammy go grifting in the UAE shortly after?

And then two of their developers alluded that it’s unfinished and said it won’t be released anytime soon, just for their CTO to shut them down two days later and saying, No, no, it’s totally coming later this year.

They could’ve made it do something cool and novel, like a cat riding a pink unicorn fighting dragons. Or probably not, because it can’t do that, so instead they made it their selling point how good it can fake reality during an already juicy election season and applauded themselves for it.