That's because work is for doing things, and home is for not doing things.
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I woke up a bit early this morning five hours ago and have accomplished zero things that need to be done today.
Average Saturday.
I think people find adhd (or any other mental thing, from autism to depression) hard to understand because they see this and think “oh, it happens to me too!” (Once, five years ago, during an objectively identifiable bad spell) So they think that whatever worked for them should also work for everyone else.
"Being gay is a choice because I ignored my urges and fell in love with someone of the opposite sex, so everyone can do it" – someone not realising they're bisexual
The “I’m gonna get my life together so I don’t have to work this shitty job” to “I’m exhausted, I’ll do it tomorrow” pipeline does seem like a pretty commonplace experience, including NT folks, even if the adhd experience of executive dysfunction is different and the strategies that NT people employ to break the cycle don’t work for them. I think this just isn’t a great example because it manifests in a way that sounds familiar to most everyone.
The list will be made.
The list will be not done.
But I will spend my whole day feeling guilty about how I should do something on the list.
The list will not even be made.
I will just do whatever my brain feels like at the moment, drop my task half way through and go snack / browse the internet / whatever and then eventually start a different task I feel like in the moment.
Yes I have a million projects, all created a mess and all are crushing me mentally right now 🫠
People ask me "you seem tired, let me know if I can lend an ear", which is sweet but I don't know how to explain to them that I'm mentally ill and it's all my own damn fault.
Currently ripped apart the mudroom from my rental house (read: not mine) because the paint was crumbling, the MDF baseboards soaked up so much salt water and the walls were permanently stained because they used bad paint, so I spent almost $500 CAD on materials to fix it up and obsessively scraped off the existing paint, then had to shellac the wallpaper... Bleh. Also have to replace the base boards with solid wood ones (treated) so they don't wick up moisture.
I found a folder of papers and copy books from my post-uni days when I was aspiring to be a writer. So many half formed ideas with "fix ____ and we have something" scrawled next to them.
Nothing was fixed. We had nothing.
This becomes even more confusing when you work from home.
I needed to fix a drain in my kitchen sink. How did I do it? I made a list of things I needed to do for work, right in the middle of my work day, then set them aside and proceeded to fix the basket drain. Then I went back and completed a couple of items on my list of work tasks after my day was technically already over. Couldn't just do the tasks in work time and fix my sink after. Noooo...
And then while you're at home you plan on how you going to be perfect at work tomorrow and catch up on everything. And you wake up and...
By the time you get home you have nothing left.
It’s because you’re exhausting your mind and body at work and the background monkey brain chatter that ADHD gifted us with. A typical brain just says “I’ll do those later” and gets the work done and then goes home to fix their life. ADHD peeps like me, can’t let go of the “do it later” and just reserve it for later, due to impaired executive function.
I’m 45 and prescribed a rather high amount of amphetamines which help me just say “I’ll do that later” and I can count on myself to actually do it later.
I especially like when those around you expect you to be productive every waking hour and then criticise you for not being that way.
Dude this is a curse that I dont wish this on anyone. It's like the mental equivalent of someone wishing you stubbed your toe every morning, or wishing all your shirts have those annoying tags in the collar that can't be removed. It's just torture.
This is why i do a lot of my chores at work.
If i can't slip them in during the day, I'll stay later in the evening to do it.
I get that's not possible for everyone but most folks can probably grab something equivalent at their own type of office/job.
ADHD preventing conventration and proper work/reward dopamine functionality "brain healthier than average"
Okay.
Would you care to explain any of what you just said?
ADHD is when your brain is healthier than average
In what way?
and your social circles are holding you back
Again, in what way?
Run far away.
From what?

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