Johnny Depp playing Johnny Depp in Johnny Depp Movie XII: Same Guy Again

she's ebbin' on my neezer till i scrooge

Predictions because this kind of movie has been fucking done to death: Johnny Deppy will have a bad relationship with his father who is a business tycoon, Bob Cratchett will be his childhood friend, he will fall in love, then something bad will happen to him that makes him give up whatever whimsical bullshit dreams he had and become an evil industrialist. After doing something particularly evil love interest will say "it's like I dont know you anymore!" and leave. Cratchett sticks around but yearns for the old scrooge who rescued him from an orphanage as a child or whatever.

This is scraping the bottom of the barrel so hard that I can only feel confused.

Did The Christmas Carol really need a prequel? Are they trying to start a multiverse franchise a la Marvel, but with royalty free books?

What's next, Huckleberry Finn 2?

Casting Depp as the type specimen for the guy who realises the error of his ways is a good bit, I appreciate that.

I'm guessing this will be like Cruella in that the character is actually nothing like the one from their original source material?

Waiting for "The Princess and the Pea 2: Pee Pee Poo Poo"

What in the name of god is this? A movie prequel to the christmas carol???

Is Tim Robinson involved? I only accept weird Christmas Carol spinoffs if Tim Robinson is involved.

Scrooge 2: Tiny Tim's Revenge

did tim burton find a new costume for his dress up boy?

We already had a GOOD Goth Scrooge in 2019

Waiting for the F. D. Signifier 45 minute video labeling it antisemitic.

I'm willing to make a deal with whatever studio is making this movie: I'll watch it if the song Ebenezer Goode by The Shamen is in it.

I mean, I'll torrent it, but I never said anything about paying.

Saw the ad for this on X, the everything app. Didn't bother turning sound on, what could be missed, but did watch till the end, befuddled and yet fully understanding what this was, we've seen this multiple times before. It's Depp being Depp, bringing unrequested charm to one of fiction's most recognizable grumps (a scrooge, even) for a story few have ever cared to ponder.

But more than that why the fuck are you releasing an ad for a Christmas movie in July, it's for a product no one wants at a time no one cares