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[–] 71 points 4 months ago (1 child)

That's a good point, Incubator

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  • [–] 63 points 4 months ago (1 child)

    Well, my daddy left home when I was three. Didn't leave very much to my mom and me. Except this old guitar and an empty bottle of booze. Now I don't blame him 'cause he run and hid but the meanest thing that my daddy ever did was before he left, he went and named me Sue.

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    [–] 44 points 4 months ago (4 children)

    Oh boy... These are real people.

    1. Drink Water Rivera: Very refreshing take on nomenclature but quite bland 8/20.
    2. Macaroni 85, Spaghetti 88, and Sincerely Yours 98 Pascual: As if someone stopped them from naming their kid after pasta because the username is already taken. 66.67/10 because they didn't commit all the way.
    3. Covid Bryant: Not quite Black Mamba, not quite the Black Death but still 8/10 or 24/30.
    4. Abcde Aeiou: Very educational A+/10
    5. Captain Philip Ines: Not quite the super soldier 19/40.
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    [–] 37 points 4 months ago (1 child)

    Its like a whole gneration hasn't listemed to Johnny Cash's "A Boy Named Sue" ← (best Folsom Prison performance)

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  • [–] 31 points 4 months ago (2 children)

    Kitchenaid Whiskey Jones is an awesome name

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  • [–] 19 points 4 months ago (6 children)

    My last name is Browning, like the gun manufacturer (distant relation). I used to joke that if I ever had boy/girl twins I would name them Colt Winchester (boy) and Biretta Glock (girl). I nearly got Colt for my youngest, but there were too many kids named Colton around.

    I also really wanted to name my first son Charlemagne. This was because back in high school when we studied the Holy Roman Empire all the girls in class were talking about how Charlemange was such a beautiful sounding name. I figured that he'd have to put up with some shit growing up, but it would all pay off because not only would he wind up with a name that people loved to say, but he'd also be resilient and hopefully with a solid sense of humor.

    My wife vetoed this nearly as soon as the ring was on her finger.

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  • [–] 27 points 4 months ago (3 children)

    Jesus christ you're awful with names for your kids.

    I hope you two didn't choose the name that has the beautiful meaning of "lightbringer" and end up naming one of your boys "Lucifer"

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  • [–] 27 points 4 months ago (2 children)

    She'd love Germany. Those names would be illegal over here.

    Then again the law also explicitly states that you can name your kid any name that's normal for your heritage. I guess that means an American would be able to name their kid Kitchenaid because it aligns with their traditions.

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    [–] 22 points 4 months ago* (6 children)
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    [–] 15 points 4 months ago* (2 children)

    I think labeling "Kitchenaid Whiskey Jones" as "borderline" is too lenient. "McKeinsleigh" I think is the borderline one. Marijuana Pepsi managed to make something of it – ironically writing her PhD thesis around it – but I would be thinking forwards and backwards about what a name I give could do to a living, breathing person their entire life (even if they get it legally changed).

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  • [–] 8 points 4 months ago

    I've always told people pick a name for your child and unless there is a realy good reason don't name them after yourself. Then say the name out loud a few times, if you can see a respected doctor,CEO, and janitor having that name then you picked a good one. Middle names are free space and that's where you can be "quirky"

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    [–] 14 points 4 months ago (1 child)

    I remember reading about some girls literally called 'undesired' on their language :(

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  • [–] 8 points 4 months ago (1 child)

    I mean, I've met girls called "Chastity" which is weird as fuck if you think about it for half a second.

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  • [–] 13 points 4 months ago

    Major Major Major

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  • [–] 11 points 4 months ago (2 children)

    There was a golfer at Augusta national and her first name was Asterisk.

    I wonder if their other children are named comma, semi colon, or parentheses?

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    [–] 11 points 4 months ago* (1 child)

    My wife and I have received several compliments just for giving both of our daughters normal, pronounceable names. Names I don't see very often anymore, but perfectly normal before 9/11 altered the timeline and made everyone unbearably stupid.

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    [–] 10 points 4 months ago (2 children)

    Hot take for Zambia and parts of Zim and Namibia. Names there are wild. Things you see, aspirations, etc. Even other African counties find it hilarious.

    https://www.legit.ng/1097767-see-hilarious-names-zambian-namibian-parents-give-children-photos.html

    I've personally met people named Nevers, as in short for "Never Again" having a baby. Also, Fuckson is a popular one. Even written in news.

    https://www.lusakatimes.com/2025/01/05/16-stolen-animals-smuggled-from-nyimba-to-lusaka-seven-suspects-arrested/

    Trevor Noah had old stand up about it.

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    [–] 9 points 4 months ago (1 child)

    Whisky Jones is a bad ass name though. That's either a porn star or a treasure hunter and I'm good either way

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    [–] 9 points 4 months ago (5 children)

    I mean, I’m Tanis, it’s rare but I like it.

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  • [–] 19 points 4 months ago (2 children)

    Rawdogging the internet with your real name is bold.

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  • [–] 21 points 4 months ago (6 children)

    First and last. I’ve just never bothered to come up with a real username in twenty years.

    If you show up at my doorstep I’ll make you tea and we can play a board game.

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    [–] 9 points 4 months ago

    Proceeds to name her son Richard

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  • [–] 8 points 4 months ago*

    Peruvians take this to another level. There's a professional soccer player named Osama Vinladen, and his brother is Sadam Huseín

    There's a town mayor election where the candidate Lenin lost to...eventual winner named after THAT Austrian artist

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  • [–] 8 points 4 months ago

    Rise of the Leighs and Dens

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  • [–] 5 points 4 months ago (3 children)

    Parents use these names because it's the pique of their cleverness.

    There is a clear socioeconomic divide between those who do and do not do this and it is exactly what one expects to to be.

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  • [–] 19 points 4 months ago (3 children)

    Honestly this is bullshit. Some of the most ridiculous names I know are from old money families here in the South.

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