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Child abuse
(thelemmy.club)
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this post was submitted on 11 Apr 2026
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Kitchenaid Whiskey Jones is an awesome name
My last name is Browning, like the gun manufacturer (distant relation). I used to joke that if I ever had boy/girl twins I would name them Colt Winchester (boy) and Biretta Glock (girl). I nearly got Colt for my youngest, but there were too many kids named Colton around.
I also really wanted to name my first son Charlemagne. This was because back in high school when we studied the Holy Roman Empire all the girls in class were talking about how Charlemange was such a beautiful sounding name. I figured that he'd have to put up with some shit growing up, but it would all pay off because not only would he wind up with a name that people loved to say, but he'd also be resilient and hopefully with a solid sense of humor.
My wife vetoed this nearly as soon as the ring was on her finger.
Jesus christ you're awful with names for your kids.
I hope you two didn't choose the name that has the beautiful meaning of "lightbringer" and end up naming one of your boys "Lucifer"
morningstar, apparently Samael is "venom of god" so that isnt a good one either.
Here's an idea, one should not name kids after characters considered bad or evil. EVEN IF IT COULD BE INTERPRETED MULTIPLE WAYS.
Hey, don't bring little Lucy into this! He already has enough trouble.
These haters are idiots.
I have firearms-oriented first and middle names, and it's fucking awesome. Instant cred with people usually suspect of others, AFAIK never a negative issue. If I had met a young woman named Biretta Glock in high school or college, I think we would have been forced by everyone in America to get married in the spot.
Charlemagne Tha God proves you right. Though that's also a great Tomboy girl name, with Charlene or Charley for short. See "The Long Kiss Good Night" for further validation.
Long Kiss Goodnight is a criminally overlooked movie
My head canon is that it's the pilot project for the Bourne project. It's probably loosely based on the Bourne books from the 80s.
Criminally underrated is actuate. It's on my top 10 movies ever. Great writing, hitting all the tropes, Samuel L. Jackson in his prime.
And Geena Davis was always cast as a sort of girl next door and to be the badass she was really showed her range.
You could sell Charlamagne as "Charles for almost anything except when he wants to show off"
Postmaster General Ford Lincoln Mercury.
That’s a bar I haven’t heard for a long time…
God, what a great name and a great movie, thanks for bringing it to the forefront of my memory.