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I know that bullying is universal worldwide, but the subculture around it differs, as in Japan it seems to be more psychological rather than physical, even if you stand out from the norm or customs.

For instance even you’re not Japanese or mixed race (like that of another nationality), is a factor that can trigger bullying, you’ll become bait for the tormentors. Seeking actual support is something they’re afraid of as the bullies threaten the victim.

Also it does not help to how teachers or adults deal with it, they literally say amongst the lines of「無視」(ignore) Well… that will be useless when it’s escalated to the breaking point. Teachers do not use the right approach, even in front of the entire class indirectly teasing or chastising him or her, there are cases that they are the bullies themselves or an accessory.

Even if the victim reports it to both parents or the school body itself, most of the time it’s brushed off as they don’t give a f*ck about it, even at the most severe cases. A common outcome is that the victim ends up thinking about 自殺 (suicide) rather than actually dealing with it, the whole idea about it has been part of the culture for centuries due to seppuku.

In most cases, media only discusses it if the victim is deceased, when the school is questioned about it, they often say “We’re not aware of it.” When they were but decide to put it under the rug. Also, the mindset most people have is “Well… we’re used to it. There’s no point in reporting it when nothing is going to happen.”

I’ve noticed that in both countries most of the tormentors are teenage girls rather than boys, they surround the victim trying to sway them away from anyone who can intervene. The subject matter of bullying in countries like Japan (or South Korea) is overlooked and brushed aside as they don’t really address it sincerely, the stigma of mental health is dire as emotional weakness is frowned upon.

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[-] bold_omi@lemmy.today 3 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago)

Quite bad. I (a gay guy) used to be called a faggot a bit. I was also mocked for my modest household income, and threatened with death because of my left-wing political stance. Then again, I lived in a Republiklan area, so that all makes sense.

[-] Xanthrax@lemmy.world 11 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

I moved around a lot when I was younger. It really depends on where you live. In most towns I lived in, there were a series of public schools that were meant to serve their immediate communities, but everyone avoided specific schools known for poor education and bullying. I spent most of my time in SoCal and didn't see much violence. If we're talking about verbal harassment/ bullying, I don't think I've been anywhere without that. It's just different versions/ severities.

[-] celeste@kbin.earth 13 points 1 day ago

You got me reading statistical analysis of bullying across countries and damn this is a complicated topic. It seems like boys are the most likely perpetrators, but I wonder if it's a difference in relational and verbal bullying vs violent bullying, and what's perceived culturally as bullying and so on.

[-] Drusas@fedia.io 2 points 1 day ago

ve noticed that in both countries most of the tormentors are teenage girls rather than boys

Not my experience in the US.

[-] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 4 points 22 hours ago

It's pretty evenly split in America, but genders generally pick on their own gender, so each thinks it's worse than the other, because they don't really know how bad the other really is.

[-] brucethemoose@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

My datapoint from a US private school: bullying was stratified. You had the very rich “in” crowd and then everyone else in clumps of niches.

But it was too fancy for much “open” bullying; it was more implied. Basically, it was this:

Literally this. Kids from the old money neighborhood would hang out the school atrium balcony.

[-] DeathByBigSad@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 day ago

I immigrated to the US at age 8

NYC.

The school I was at was like somewhere 25% to 50% Asians, probably ethnic Chinese from what I remember of their names (especially the last names).

I get bullied a lot by English-Only ethnic Chinese kids...

Because I was different...

Cuz... language barrier...

Like... Bruh...

Okay I see.

You feel superior because you have birthright citizenship...

We are literally from the same place... the fuck is wrong with y'all

Like there's always a weird thing with the ABCs (American Born Chinese)

Even after I sort of learned English...

From my memory, they've always been much much more likely to just bully me.

Cuz I'm a "Fresh off the boat peasant" and they're born American...

fuck them (the bullies, not saying all ABCs are like that)

Idk why but I always seem to instantly bond with Cantonese speakers... like maybe not exactly being friend-friend... but having the same shared language quickly dispels any possible hostility very quickly... Those with fluency anyways...

the ABCs assigned to "translate" for me are kinda passive-aggressive...

My ABC cousins refused to talk to me...

one of my cousins bullied me...

like....

most of my bullies at this point in time were just ethnic-Chinese born in the US...

dipshits

Anyways.

We later moved to Philly.

Less Asians.

Instead of just merely Language Discrimination, now instead RACISM spiked a lot. I felt like I was the only Asian in the room (well maybe not exactly, but I felt like I was so "out of place")

I didn't feel safe.

Basically throught my whole journey... I sort of felt like shit could go down at any time...

Like sailing the turbulent oceans...

Oh I defended myself in Highschool and I got arrested

FOR SELF DEFENCE

I was 17.

Charges got dropped but still, wtf.

Those who attacked me were not ethnic-Chinese. Happening during the height of covid, right before they shut down the schools.

So there's that.

They don't care about bullying. You report it and its just "Oh he's a good kid, there mUsT be some misunderstanding"

The kid is white...

Yeah okay teacher, sure thing...

The takeaway from this school journey is: For me, do not live where I don't see a lot of Asians... preferably live closer to who are ethnic Chinese... best if multilingual... if you lack English, ABCs will not even try to talk to you (maybe it works different in the adult world), if you lack the Chinese languages, 1st gens will not be able to talk to you...

probably do not raise kids in Philly, it's a horrible place. ABCs can be cunts... If I ever have kids... I'll make sure they don't end up being those ABC dipshits that I had to face...

[-] sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz 3 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Depends on your skin tone, presentation, and state. At its worst, yeah we kill kids or make them kill themselves. It's not always that extreme but there is a universal sentiment about "weeding out the weak". It just varies how far each state is willing to tolerate children and staff taking it.

There's boiling the frog, but we also got killing Brian Deneke and Matthew Shepard

this post was submitted on 21 Mar 2026
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