Newsom is the living personification of why Democrats lose elections, updated and glow'd up for the current Kafka-has-dysentery fever dream timeline
You know folks, I first read this post and thought it was so absurd and self-satirizing that I didn't even consider the possibility that it was real.
Imagine my horror upon doing a quick research
use ticket code: NEWSOM
Wild horses using traction aids couldn’t drag my greased body to this.
what if the only thing on stage was a big cauldron filled with chunks of Gavin Newsom and a blend of spices
Young Man in a Curry 
Cannibalizing Gavin Newsome and gaining his power: the unmistakable appearance of an untrustworthy stoat that was turned into a man with magic.
Badum tish!
"Unscripted" yeah right I love the way they just lie right to your face
fighting major national political battles
Going with the flow on transphobia, healthcare, and militarizing the police? Oh yeah definitely fighting some major battles.
Banned? DM Wmill to appeal.
No anti-nautilism posts. See: Eco-fascism Primer
Slop posts go in c/slop. Don't post low-hanging fruit here.