this post was submitted on 02 Nov 2023
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[–] [email protected] 53 points 10 months ago (2 children)

You can't create calories that way, only transfer them. But if you have a skinny bard and a fat minotaur, it can work and also is definitely someone's fetish.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Minotaurs, if anything like their brahman brethren, can get nutrition from all kinds of roughage that us puny primates can't. So while we're scrambling around for nuts and goodberries, they can make a meal of all the weeds sprouting in terrible soil, and the odd hay bale lying around to feed someone's horses.

TL;DR: They could feasibly turn what we consider indigestible garbage-plants into calorie-rich milk.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 10 months ago

That's true and adds much-needed realism to my nurtured-by-a-minotaur fantasies.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Especially if the minotaur is a dude

[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago

"I have nipples, Greg, could you milk me?"

[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)

The dude minotaurs very much enjoy being milked.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago
[–] [email protected] 46 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

3 days of fasting isn't a huge burden, especially for hardy adventuring types.

3 days without water? bring out the milk

[–] [email protected] 33 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Mino-taur -> taurus -> bull

Hate to break it to you, but that's a different kind of "milk" then what you might be thinking of.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 10 months ago

They said it was a bard. What's your point ? XD

[–] [email protected] 22 points 10 months ago

Protein is protein 💪

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

I'm pretty sure in D&D they call both sexes minotaurs. Minobous would technically make more sense for a girl, but nobody knows what that means. And we're looking at etymology based on countries that probably don't exist in your setting.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 10 months ago (1 children)

When the furry RP server spills over into the tabletop session.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Hey, if everyone’s cool with it!

[–] [email protected] 24 points 10 months ago

Cleric: Summons food from thin air with Create Food And Water.

Funnily enough, the only time I used that spell, it was to use the food for ammunition and to turn the water into napalm.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago (4 children)

Can the party's resident druid wildshape into a cow, eat some grass, get milked, and then turn back into a human?

My God, I'm asking questions that should never be answered.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

Can they become some giant beast and slough off their appendages for food? Does it disappear once they change back? What if it's already metabolized by then? How about they just make some goodberries instead.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Don't they have to give birth first?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

If a person can alter its body composition to become an entirely different species, I don't think it would be a stretch to say that it can choose to become a member of that species that's able to produce milk.

For the same reason, in my world druids can choose the gender of the animal they become. You're a person and you're turning into a bear, and you can already choose to become a black, brown or white bear; there's no reason you couldn't choose if that bear has a dick or not, and I honestly don't care either way.

That being said, I was being sarcastic. Although it's not specified RAW, RAI, it would work just like any other magical transformation: anything that detaches from, is produced by or is separated from the "main" magical body, disappears after a short while. Iirc somewhere on Twitter or the Sage Advice there's confirmation of this (the context wasn't milk produced by a cow-shaped druid, of course, but venom extracted by a viper-shaped druid).

And if a druid asked to feed their party this way, or a party member asked the druid to do this (either with or without their consent) I wouldn't allow it because that's not something I (and probably someone else, too) would be comfortable with.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

I like the thought that you could choose for what purpose when you select the thing you transform into.
Is it for fighting, traveling, hiding, adventuring, reproduction, collecting materials off from etc

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Well, if we're "um aktshually", wild shape doesn't last long enough for them to digest the grass and turn it into milk.

But if you have a druid with you, why don't you have goodberry?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

If we're on a campaign where survival is a thing we need to worry about i have to assume goodberry is banned.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

That's fair. You could also adjust it to consume it's material components, so that you need to forage for them.

Turn it from "hunger-b-gone" to "I have a few twigs of [uniquely special] mistletoe in case we all fuck up our survival rolls and really need food".

[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Don't cows need to be pregnant to lactate?

[–] [email protected] 46 points 10 months ago

Bard can also fix that.

[–] [email protected] 43 points 10 months ago (1 children)

A male Minotaur can be miked anytime.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago (1 children)

miked ? So like, getting a mike for a distrack ?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

The fuck was my autocorrect doing there? Is miked even a word?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

How about this : so a fan junped onto the stage to shout a love poem to the singer so the manager miked him for everyone to hear

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago

Not with that spirit you don't !

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Would a minotaur have breasts or an udder?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Breasts. Because I'm a snitties fan.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

Snakes with udders. You know you need it.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Here's an artist's interpretation, NSFW I guess

I promise this does not represent the manga as a whole, this is the most questionable frame in all of Dungeon Meshi

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

Sounds like a win-win.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

"I have nipples, Gregator. Can you milk me?"

[–] [email protected] 0 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Is.. Is that a Rich Hall/QI reference I spy?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago
[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

Also works if they have other mammal races, such as humans.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago