As folks have said. An individual asshole has advantage over an individual non asshole. Thing is our society can only funtion with a certain amount of assholes before collapsing and it does not take a surprisingly large amount. Which is why we are collapsing.
I don't know where you're getting the idea that people don't care. People do care, a lot of people care a lot. Part of the problem is that people who want to act ethically and politely, people who want to minimize harm, are going to be at a distinct disadvantage when opposing people for whom the ends always justify the means, and the ends they seek are their own betterment above all else.
If your idea of action is sternly worded letters and peaceful protest, and my idea of action is violence and unabashed corruption of authority, you're going to have a real uphill battle to dislodge me from any power I manage to gain. It doesn't mean the corrupt assholes are unstoppable, only that their methods are more aligned with the acquisition and retention of power.
The system isn't formed based on the wills of individuals, nor is there an inherent "nice" or "mean" quality to people. If we all decide we want to live in a perfect utopia, that still won't take form, because that's not how societal progression works. We live in capitalism, because capitalism emerged from preceding modes of production like feudalism. It wasn't a choice people made, but an economic progression on the basis of private property and free-moving capital, which leads us to today where a tiny handful own the lion's share of production.
Capitalism is riddled with contradictions, however, and these contradictions sharpen over time. We move onto socialism by organizing, where we can actually take control of production and run it along a common plan to suit the needs of the people.
Edit: figured it's a good chance to plug my introductory Marxist-Leninist reading list, if what I said makes sense to you!
More and more I see that a lot of people who think they’re “nice” are just lazy and largely uprincipled people who assume that they’re doing good simply because they have good intentions and they’re not actively creating problems.
Don't forget, supporting the status quo and doing the popular thing, regardless of how hypocritical it is.
What gets me is how openly hypocritical people are becoming. There is no more shame. I notice that many of the 'principled' people think their principles do not apply to them. Only other people that they don't like.
I'm not even talking politics. Often in personal relationships people will tell you how lying is awful, but then lie themselves and justify it by claiming that everyone else is doing it or that they had to do it because they are 'disadvantaged'.
Gork, what is capitalism?
To look at people in capitalist society and conclude that human nature is egoism, is like looking at people in a factory where pollution is destroying their lungs and saying that it is human nature to cough.
People who don't realize that tolerance is a social contract will tolerate assholism, which abets the assholing.
That's got to stop.
Yeah. Now stop being afraid and stand up to the fucking bullies. Now watch as they change the definition of "intolerant".
"Standing up to a bully that wants to kill you? That's Intolerant!".
Sound familiar? The nazi with the giant hole in his neck? Oh no, I'm being intolerant. The christian terrorist nazi psychopath with the giant hole in his neck.
You won't have a chance to be intolerant of the nazis very soon, if you don't start fighting against the nazis in effective ways.
Ok but how do we deal with.... you know.. those people who destroy community for profits, who undermine us by exposing us with global competition, the people who promote laws like "right to work" and "no child left behind" to break our organizations against their power asymmetry while making us dumber and weaker, the people who rig the system with a smile without saying even one slur ?
Do we have to tolerate them if they duck us by the rules ?
That makes sense actually
WTF didn't Popper include that obvious fact ?
Was it just taken for granted in the post world wars that assholes catch bullets ?
It can certainly feel that way. And I do think there is no such thing as an ethical billionaire, if by favouring assholes you mean rewarding monetarily.
I argue though, that without kindness there would be no societies. Even if the parable of the Margaret Mead's healed femur isn't true, the fact remains that there are in fact those who help, and they are probably more plentiful than those who hurt. They're just harder to spot, because media makes money off emotions and fear and anger are stronger than hope.
To quote Mr Rogers "look for the helpers", because they are there. And if you're not seeing them, maybe it's time for a news break. Including social media, just for a week. And then see how you are feeling. I have to take breaks now and then, and I promise it helps.
Darwin talked about societies and advancement in species around communication. It is important for us to be able to communicate threats in order to build community. Assholes don't build lasting societies.
Assholes don't build lasting societies.
Thank you for articulating my point better!!!
I don’t think that there’s more assholes than decent people. I think the assholes just stick out more.
I think deep down most people are assholes. But it's just hard-wiring.
Not being a decent person is hard. And assholes won't think you're decent unless you are also an asshole with them.
Sadly, I think that’s the way it’s been since the beginning of humanity and I don’t see it ever changing.
Richard Dawkins lays this out nicely in The Selfish Gene.
Sure I care but what can I do besides voting?
Organizing, which is far more important, and it isn't close. Voting is less than the bare minimum.
Not voting. It shows the system that the electoral theater they put up to placate the people doesn't fool you.
I can think of one recent event
not saying it's valid, just that it's a possibility
Unfortunately society encourages and glorifies shitty behaviour. So this behaviour is completely normalised for the majority of people who see it as a thing to be desired, rather than something thats shitty.
Amen. Just look at media. Look at popular media.
Tells you all you need to know.
You need to be a bit of an asshole to stand up against assholes. Nice people dont want to be assholes and bend over backwards to make concessions and accommodations.
There is a difference (to me) of what constitutes an asshole. They are hateful pricks with no concern for others.
You dont need to be an asshole to fight one, you just need to be brave enough to fight one. Of course, they are assholes and they fight dirty, you will get dirty in the process.
First step, dont be a Asshole. After that dont support one. Then, dont raise any. Finally stand up to them.
It damages my calm on a daily basis. Our society rewards sociopathy. It’s that simple. And I fucking hate it.
I've noticed this. Even in small groups of 'community' minded people. The sociopaths always rise to the top and the good honest people get pushed aside. And people LOVE it. Because the sociopaths tell people what they want to hear and people love being lied to.
And nothing pisses off a sociopath more when you aren't swayed by their bullshit or offer deference to their status. They get so angry with you and they will then character assassinate you, usually by spreading lies and rumors. And people eat it up because they'd rather believe in dramatic bullshit lies than the truth in front of their faces.
A bummer because im naturally nice and i get upset at people who aren't. I just dont get it. I feel awful if I'm mean or something by accident or get misinterpreted. I wonder what it is, because my parents are not very nice people.
I grew up in a household full of hateful bigoted ignorant people. I'm aware of the consequences of that.
People who didn't grow up with that experience aren't. I noticed most of the hateful ignorant people I meet grew up with 'supportive' parents... and basically were isolated form the consequences of their actions. They don't have ot be nice or kind... because they will get what they want regardless of how they behave because money and power and privileged.
These are also the same people who think anyone who doesn't have a elite degree or wear designer clothing is subhuman. They think they are inherently superior to other human beings because they possess these things... which were given to them by their wealthy families and they operated under the delusion that anyone who doesn't have those things just didn't work hard as they did. And anyone who doesn't want them... is mentally ill.
The assholes generally take charge because they are self-aggrandizing assholes. I genuinely believe most people are good and trying to just get by. It is very hard to not be distracted by the mountains of daily life struggles one has to wade through because of the power hungry assholes.
I mean, I really think the biggest thing is that so many people are fully bought into the idea that any alternative system would be just disastrous and lead to mass starvation thanks to propaganda.
The worst is when they erase the immense famines in Tsarist Russia, China under the Kuomintang, etc, pretending that socialism caused the famines they experienced, when socialism gradually erased famine and hunger in both Russia and China.
There are more assholes than good people because assholery typically delivers better results in terms of wealth, power, and status, and good people have to accept a lower social status in order to maintain their goodness, but most people don't fall into either category.
But the vast majority of people fall into an apathetic middle ground where they don't really think too much about any kind of moral consistency and act according to paths they're already on and the rules those paths require.
Yeah that's accurate. I accept lower social status for my goodness.
Turns out other people don't admire that. They admire assholes and they tend to think anyone who isn't seeking wealth, power, and status is mentally deficient. At least in USA. I have been told many times that me not rent-seeking and exploiting others is 'being lazy'.
The assholes bought everything up, including the law and politicians. They rigged the game so no one else can climb the same ladder they did. But, also, death throes look like this. They positioned themselves so that the entire populous of the earth can't sustain life, unless they don't. That imbalance is about to be corrected. It's gunna get a little bit worse before it gets better though, hang on.
I know it may seem that way if you're constantly online these days, but in general most people are just people. Like 80% are mostly good, but human, and may have some minor issues. Probably 10% are Jesus-level good, then 10% are sociopathically evil.
Now, if by society you mean "American capitalism", then yes that favors assholes who care less about their fellow humans. This flavor of capitalism is inherently selfish and greedy, so those who succeed in it are the most greedy and bad people. Yes people care, but the forces preventing anyone from changing it are the strongest in the history of human civilization with technology too now, that makes it borderline impossible to change the underlying system. Only a major catastrophe caused by capitalism where millions of Americans died would cause the general populace to question the system, but honestly even then who fucking knows.
Nice people are unwilling to do the things necessary to stop assholes. Nice people won't berate them, most won't call them out, etc etc.
This is going to be an unpopular opinion because most people like to think of themselves as nice. I think it's not so much that there are nice people and assholes, but rather that almost everyone is an asshole some of the time.
pretty much. and most people think you're an asshole if you disagree with them.
can't tell you how many times I get told I am an asshole for not being into professional sports. for example. i think it's pretty harmless, but for pro-sports fanatics I'm a heathen to their religion.
The assholes are louder or more annoying, but in my experience the vast majority of people are kind.
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_[email protected]~