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submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[-] [email protected] 94 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

The worst part of a viral apocalypse is that it takes a fuckton of stupid, unobservant and selfish people to spread it irreparably before it's noticed. The best part is that, in the West at least, we have witnessed an adequate amount of aforementioned morons who'd do just that in our universe

[-] [email protected] 69 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Oh, if zombies are very slow-motion slow, blind & death, it takes at least 10 bites to infect you, and you basically have to help them move their jaw to actually bite you - we are stil not surviving the apocalypse.

We will however have to go to work through all if it.

[-] [email protected] 23 points 2 weeks ago

eSsEnTiAl WoRkErS

[-] [email protected] 23 points 2 weeks ago

"You’ve got to remember that these are just simple farmers. These are people of the land. The common clay of the new West. You know… morons."

[-] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago

Strangely enough, those "simple farmers" are those who will avoid you because they need to get the work done.

Unless they happen to be on SocialMedia and the propaganda algorithm wants them to be conspiracy theorists.

[-] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

I'm just saying the vaccine to cure zombification is more dangerous than the zombie bite! I could get autism or something!

[-] [email protected] 41 points 2 weeks ago

On lemmy.ml they’d be arguing that the zombie should be supported because a zombie apocalypse will destroy US imperialism.

[-] [email protected] 25 points 2 weeks ago

And that any evidence of the zombie eating brains is simply Western propaganda.

[-] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

Like the girl in the comic, for example. The zombie didn't eat her brain and she's clearly very smart.

[-] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

And in the US they would claim the zombie was made by China.

[-] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

I'd argue the zombies are effective at eating the rich

[-] [email protected] 31 points 2 weeks ago

After seeing how excited some folks got during COVID, that's genuinely somewhat of a worry for me. Kind of like how lonely, young men can be sold on the idea of war, because they think they'll finally be adored as a hero, you can just as well find preppers who think they'll finally be adored, because they bought toilet paper before everyone else could.

In the case of COVID, it was thankfully a disappointment for the preppers, in that the best survival strategy was staying in your cushty home. That will be the case for the vast majority of infectious diseases. But I still bet someone out there had the intrusive thought that maybe they shouldn't help reduce the spread of COVID, because you won't be deemed a hero without a real crisis...

[-] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

Teddy Roosevelt wanted a war to make him into a more famous President.

[-] [email protected] 24 points 2 weeks ago

Idea for a horror comedy movie:

A group of teenagers encounter the first zombie and put it down, but the damn thing just keeps getting back up.

[-] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

How about one that diverts expectations?

Like, instead of slow zombies, you get fast ones. Faster than they could run before. Maybe even faster than some vehicles. Because they don't feel pain.

And instead of dumb zombies, they are smart. They set traps, use tools. Maybe even drive cars.

Shooting the brain also does nothing. You got to shoot them in the ass since that is the way the parasite entered the body and how they communicate with the hive.

And like all the zombie preppers die-out quickly because they think the zombies will react like the ones from Hollywood. So they think they can play the hero while being outsmarted by fast zombies.

Humanity would not last long, and afterwards the world is populated entirely by a zombie civilization that looks eerily similar to our own but like better.

[-] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

World War Z - fast

Reanimator - smart

The Return of the living dead - immune to headshots, make traps

Dreamcatcher - Alien Ass Parasites

Zombieland - unlikely survivors

I don't think you're as original as you think you are, pal. Good luck on your screenplay go, sounds like a great time.

[-] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

I'll try, the billionaires figure out a serum that let's them live forever but forces them to consume human flesh which becomes, with automatisation, one of the few ways to make a living for the filthy non-billionaires who decided not to be born rich.

[-] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

You're just describing vampires/peter theil, except flesh now.

[-] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago
[-] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

Fiction imitates life.

[-] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

Thats a really good original plot, the closest thing to that would be Daybreakers 2009 but it's not very similar.

[-] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

None of those depict an after-the-apocalypse world run by smart zombies, though.

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[-] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

The Return of the Living Dead (1985)

[-] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

NGL I did enjoy that film, but it had a lot of invincible zombies not just 1.

I'm talking about a film with ONE cheesy, campy, animalistic, frothing and gurgling zombie that they run over, stab, burn, shoot in the head, feed its intestines into a woodchipper, cut in half, etc but it just keeps crawling back to find another victim when they're displaying a human moment of vulnerability.

Specifics can change but I imagine a misty mountainside with lots of oaks and a creek and long winding roads. Put the kids out there as part of their college studies in cooperation with the forestry services. Get a scene where a character breaks their leg from a fall and has to crawl away while being chased by the zombie with only 1 arm, a head, and a torso.

Possibly have the twist ending be the last survivor find an old torn apart camp with the zombie's camera and personal identifying information and the character realizes he died out there all alone and nobody ever even looked for him, make it a meta-narrative about male loneliness destroying lives, idk, there is options for sure.

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[-] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

Weekend against Bernie

[-] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

Chop it up so it can't move. Problem solved!

[-] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah but then the movie would end. It would be like the Child's Play film if the mom read the instructions on the box.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

"Why don't they just chop it up so it can't move?"

"Because then there wouldn't be a movie."

"Oh, right, that makes sense."

[-] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

Theres also the HISHE series that goes over a ton of movies like that, too.

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[-] [email protected] 19 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Seems like many people genuinely long for some kind of massive cataclysm that creates a Mad Max world. Kind of reminds me of some notable WWI veteran saying something like he rather enjoyed it. The difference is that he was looking back on stuff he'd actually done, and most of the people fantasizing are wannabees who wouldn't last 5 minutes if the real thing happened.

[-] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

my family used to run a business that imported products from american companies specialising in things like hand loading (basically making your own ammunition). just before we got out of the business, around 15 years or so, one of the bigger actors (starts with an H, guy named steve runs it), they introduced a zombie-themed line of products, including ammunition cases, fake blood spattered bandoliers, and targets.

just... human targets. with zombie print on them. for civilian use.

to say that they just did this in order to be able shoot people without consequence might be judging too harshly... if we hadn't met steve.

[-] [email protected] 15 points 2 weeks ago

Report the zombie to ICE as an illegal immigrant.

[-] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

Ahahahaha xD

[-] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago

That's genuinely the reaction when I pointed out how ridiculous it is for the military (or anyone really) to be overwhelmed by a rotting and slow-moving corpse. World War Z and I am Legend made the zombie apocalypse more believable.

[-] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

You ought to play Dying Light. Freshly made zombies move fast, then slow down to a crawl. Also some mutate and come out at night to hunt.

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[-] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

World War z had a good section on why conventional warfare vs zombies fails. (Headshot x volume > ammunition)

[-] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago

Probably a net benefit for the environment, too…

[-] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago
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[-] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago

A super-win for biodiversity, the last hail Mary that somehow unexpectedly worked.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

Sometimes it feels like I'm the only motherfucker on the internet that doesn't want humanity to die off.

What's wrong with y'all?

[-] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Zombies are people too. Technically humanity “lives” on.

Protect zombie rights to eat, donate your brain and join the hord today!

[-] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

We love nature and hate what humanity has become. Simple

[-] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago

pretty bizarre to see a zombie pop out and presume kt is the first and only zombie in the world

[-] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

I dunno. It'd be nice to mix things up a bit. Find a whole new set of things to worry about.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

Could just be a regular necromancy zombie.

[-] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

Accelerationism in a nutshell.

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[-] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

It would also be so much very a lot eco friendly.

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this post was submitted on 01 Jul 2025
535 points (98.4% liked)

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