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Had a funnel web drop onto my shoulder while gardening one day. Thankfully a friend saw it and swatted it off me before it could do anything!
Cars are in most places in Australia. They'll f you up. Trains are less common and more predictable, but they f you up too if you get on the wrong side of them
There is a stereotype in the rest of the world that, in Australia, everything there is out to kill you.
This is just flat wrong. Pretty much every wild animal in Australia will do its best to avoid confrontation with humans.
It isn't even true that the most deadly animals in the world are in Australia. As you might expect, that goes to animals which sometimes seek and attack other animals like humans: wolves, hippopotamus, bear, mosquito, etc. Nothing special about Australia there.
It's probably a mis-understanding of the truth: That Australia is home to animals with the most deadly venom in the world. Arachnids and reptiles, sea creatures, etc. with highly toxic venom.
This is a very different statement. Most of those animals with deadly venom, are not “out to kill you”. They are deadly but don't tend to seek humans; they have deadly defenses that they will employ if they feel trapped or ambushed.
Some of these animals do seek shelter, which in remote areas often brings them into human habitation. In rural areas you do need to check you're not going to surprise a bitey animal when going to the toilet or other nice sheltered spaces.
So, no the Australian wildlife is not “out to kill you”; quite the contrary, if you move carefully it will do its best to steer clear of you, it has no interest in getting near you and your big mammalian ways.
It's not something I worry about where I am.
Yes, there are dangerous snakes in the bush nearby. Never seen one near the house, and rarely see them in the bush. They go the other way. Make noise.
Yes, there are deadly spiders around the house. Pretty sure there's a funnel web camping under the end of the handle of one of the recycling bins. I just grab the other end and eventually the rain will hunt him away. Don't recall seeing one inside the house, but I do put down crawly spray for other pests, and that would probably stop them too.
Dropbears cannot be stopped. You just have to accept its warm embrace and welcome the peace as you drift into the darkness.
It's only the humans that worry me.
Australia has lots of venomous animals but with an astronomically low mortality rate these days. IIRC the 10 most venomous snakes in the world can all be found in Australia
We don't have any large predators that would actively hunt people, worst case is you'd be messed up by a wombat, kangaroo or boar if you were an idiot towards them.
I keep finding myself uncomfortably close to deadly snakes, but they always zip off into the bush.
lots of snakes, lots of red back spiders,
Every day when I have to cross the road. Cars are a bloody menace and we need a national cull.
As a cyclist I have to agree. My number one fear is drivers.
Number 2 is magpies. And the biggest danger with a magpie is...that it knocks me off my bike into traffic. So cars.
Honestly, every brush with death in my life has been a result of my own actions.
- Almost picked up a snake when out on a school bushwalk; because I assumed one of the other boys had left a fake one in such an obvious spot to scare the girls. I was left with an outstretched hand a couple of centimeters from where it had been before it fled.
- Stepped in a funnel web spiders nest/trap that I knew was there.
- Existed as a teenager who jumped into the car of a teenager who should never have been allowed behind the wheel or under the bonnet. You get the idea.
Never, so far.
Honestly don't understand the "everything will kill you" meme. In the US there are animals that can literally hunt and kill you, whereas all we have is snakes that might bite you if you happen to walk on it. That's about it. No snake is getting a whiff of you camping and coming to try and eat you.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Animal_attacks_in_Australia
I'm more at risk of being in a car crash and dying on the way to work than I am at getting nope-roped in my sleep.
Crocs will absolutely hunt you but for most of Australia that's not a concern since they're a fair way up north. I come across Eastern Browns about once or twice a month when it's warm but other than that it's mostly idiots on the road 🤷♂️
As someone from the u.s that's kinda interesting to hear given that whole Australia meme. I've even been in that situation while hiking here in the US.
We stopped to set up camp after hiking for the day and noticed a set of eyes looking at us from the bushes some distance away while we were eating. We heard a bunch of howling after we were done and so we got into our hammocks holding our hatchets. We heard a bunch of something, still not entirely sure what, wolf/coyote or whatever walking around our campsite. Then when we were heading back the next day we came across a black bear cub, meaning momma was somewhere close by. Both of those things could have totally fucked our day up lol
Quite rarely, I've come close to a few snakes and encountered funnelwebs but across my life you could still count close encounters without running out of fingers.
This guy is the last that comes to mind, a decent sized brown that was a bit annoyed that I'd walked right past him so we stopped and stared at each other for a while before he backed off.
this post was submitted on 03 Jun 2025
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