this post was submitted on 09 Apr 2025
162 points (100.0% liked)

chapotraphouse

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[–] [email protected] 59 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Imaginary numbers do imaginary things

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Uhh, my portfolio just dropped to $(√-1). Do I hodl?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I’ve got a whole trunk load of Copenhagen. What now?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Oh shit oh fuck

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

write the rest of that song

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

This specifically is likely due to losses but also due to a large withdrawal or something.

[–] [email protected] 50 points 1 month ago (1 children)

They have really turned on Donald Trump, which is kind of interesting considering the amount of slurs.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Well see the problem is Trump isn't conservative enough

[–] [email protected] 47 points 1 month ago

windows xp shutdown noise

[–] [email protected] 46 points 1 month ago (2 children)

on the other side you got the bears that just quadrupled their money on put options. bears are always losing let them have this moment.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 month ago (2 children)

i have the bear phenotype and yet i have not quadrupled my money what am i doing wrong

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago

You are woke, therefore you are broke. Those are the rules, sorry.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

you would if you had gambled all your money (and your grandma's pension money), borrowed on top and marginmaxxing and put all of it on out of the money put options on NASDAQ.

[–] [email protected] 40 points 1 month ago (5 children)

How do these tater tots even get so much money to start with.

[–] [email protected] 60 points 1 month ago (2 children)
  1. Liquidating crypto they bought or mined when it was cheap to do so, and winning the gamble it would go up
  2. Taking debt and investing with the hopes of beating interest rates
  3. They don't have that much and they're doing leverage plays and getting burned
  4. They're lying and doctoring screenshots
  5. They're working in lucrative jobs in finance or similar and blowing their savings
[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

i think a lot of it is margin which is extra risky

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Its definitely this one. Robin hood is still used for its simplicity (the other more 'serious' trading apps are pretty garbage) but because they also approve hella margin for everyone.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago
  1. Being born into it and inexplicably assuming that meant they were smart
[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 month ago

the same way every other rich person gets their money to start with: from their parents

[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 month ago

A very small number, like 1 in 10000, make like a 10000% return on something that normally would have lost them every penny and post something like this when they try it again and lose. It's pretty sad. Many with bad gambling problems.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

(Lower middle class Job + no social life) x years = a modest amount of money

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

From my experience, living with the parents and having no social life, it’s pretty easy to gamble on the stock market even on 15hr. So I can imagine someone who lives with their parents and makes 50k-100k could be moving fat stacks of cash on the market

[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago

In hindsight, it was very naive of me to assume that whole Gamestop/Robinhood fiasco would have taught these nerds that this shit was rigged from the start even if you followed all the supposed rules.

The game does not exist so the rich can play it. The game exists so the rich can win it and have it look like they won it fairly.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 month ago

sicko-hexbear The Hexbear market strikes again!

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 month ago (2 children)

alexa what is portfolio balancing

no seriously, I am completely clueless

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Its just buying different shit. You might pick up some stocks from some different sectors, maybe some bonds, some commodities, etc.

The issue right now is that everything is tanking.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Even with everything tanking, it’s impressively bad investing to lose 100% of your investments on a <15% overall stock market downturn.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

give me enough leverage and I can accrue more debt than the world

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That's what options are for!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

Ah that'll be it. They've gambled their entire portfolio (if you can even call it that) on a bunch of put options that suddenly became impossible to fill the moment the market rebounded. 5-dimensional chess move.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Buying a basket of blue chip crypto projects

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago

The supply is 0 so the price is infinite

Just supply and demand

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago

Looks like you still got a cent there. Get back in the game!

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago

If we are being honest r/wallstreetbets are always going through something.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

...how? markets are bad but how do you lose 100%?

EDIT: Probably gambled the entire balanced on put options just before the tariffs were reversed lmfao

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

oh no, numby go down

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

Those Bed, Bath and Beyond holders are going to be really upset.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

Didn't sell when warren did smh idiot

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy: