this post was submitted on 11 Sep 2024
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The Dredge Tank

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Fuck this Schrodinger's Predator shit.

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[–] [email protected] 62 points 1 month ago (1 children)

"I trolled you into thinking I was a creepy incel by speaking and acting like a creepy incel."

Many such cases.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 month ago (2 children)

The chuddiest of my chud relatives once made a SV joke about his own daughter, while she was in the room. His wife was so zoned out and used to that shit that she didn't even notice until I told her later, but I really hope that kid rebels hard and stops talking to him later in life.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That's one of my very, very few red lines where I'm prepared to throw hands if I hear that shit and don't get an immediate apology.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

The social dynamics of the moment involved me being in the chud's house, where his wife was so used to his chuddery that she zoned out and didn't even notice what he just said while she was within earshot, and my TTRPG group being too stunned to do much but sit in silence for a few moments until the chud whined that "no one had a sense of humor anymore." billionaire-tears

Maybe I should have thrown hands. Maybe.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Maybe I should have thrown hands. Maybe.

Roll an advantaged strength check:

d20-fuck-ya d20-fuck-ya

editI wouldn't physically fight (not worth the trouble) but I would pull him aside and tell him he made the whole party uncomfortable. If he hits back "its a joke" line, tell him straight faced that jokes are supposed to be funny.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I didn't return and I never brought my group back there, even if that saddened the new player. His demand was that he had to always be present during games with his daughter (his wife being there didn't matter), so because of his petty my-hero custody battle of sorts, that meant I couldn't run any more games for her.

Sad situation all around; I knew she enjoyed the experience and maybe the Gambo shit flew right over her head because her Halloween costume that same year when she visited my house was custom-made to resemble that session's princess character, prop weapons and all.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

You made the right call, and I also feel bad for her sadness

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (4 children)

Contextually, it made it worse that that was that daughter's very first D&D experience (she personally asked me to introduce her to the game), and while she seemed to be having a good time and quickly learned the starter rules, her father demanded a seat at the table with the rest of my group that had her as a guest.

During an old fashioned and timeless "villainous rogues kidnap the princess (she was playing a princess) and hold her for ransom" plot hook (the adventure was going to be her escaping the dungeon with the party's help, blasting some bad guys with early level spells, and escaping with some treasure), the chud father was so Gambobrained that he said out loud, unprompted and with a self-congratulatory chuckle "if this was realistic she would be (SV here)." didnt-kill-himself

The new player was still single digits in age and his daughter. This emoji combination was never more applicable. awooga libertarian-alert hypersus

The chud father looked around with an offended expression and muttered that "no one had a sense of humor anymore." billionaire-tears

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yo that's so fucked up, hopefully the child had no idea what that meant

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago

I hope so too, but if the kid's mother was "used to him talking like that" and was only mildly upset when I restated exactly what he had said hours later in online correspondence, I was worried and still am worried.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Not to mention, depending on the class of criminal, the princess' purity would be a bargaining chip so they'd really rather not be awful. I'm increasingly less surprised by stories like this

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I wanted a storybook standard "the princess' off-camera father is surely rich so the villains want a ransom for her safe return" motivation but Gambo brain is going to Gambo brain.

Yes, he was the same chud that raged and ranted at a dinner party for over an hour about the gay blowjob that Gambo apparently had once. Everything else on the show was fine while he was oinking and gobbling his hog slop with his children in the room, by his own boasting about their "maturity" while they played with toys on the living room carpet, but not that. grill-broke gayroller-2000

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It makes me think of my friend with whom our relationship has deteriorated into him making, and I don't want to make this word plural because it's the same joke, a joke about gay fellatio if ever two men exist around each other. Fighting, agreement, laughter, gaming, business, argument, ANYTHING. I don't even want to talk to him anymore. His personality seems to revolve around gay fellatio - it's not like something I'm sensitive to when it comes up, it's incessant and central to how he presents himself. I almost can't believe it as I write it.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I'm not even talking "lol closet case" necessarily when I say my life experience has been that homophobes talk about and seem to think about gay sex more than gay people seem to do.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

I think it'd be hard to point at a time where he's been outright hateful, so I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. But I suppose I've seen someone turn transphobic in nursing school before and they got all obsessive with misgendering me and insisting I was using steroids as the central theme of how they present themselves. It's really gross and dumb and weird and frustrating. It's absolutely a plausible conclusion.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Jesus Hussein Christ...

[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 month ago (1 children)

one time IRL, some extremely annoying and cloying douche kept trying to "joke" with me by being extremely annoying, purposely mishearing what I said and making me repeat myself, etc etc. that shit may have put me off balance when I was younger and less secure in myself, but not anymore.

anyway, so after a few minutes of this I'm like just looking at him, bored, when he pulls the "I'm just joking man, lighten up" I relaxed my face and started to smile, saying, "oh my bad. I was confused because jokes are supposed to be funny." totally deadpan, selling it all the way like Jason Bateman was my acting coach, with no malice.

his colleague next to him who had probably had been putting up with this shit for days laughed in his dumb face while his brain still was calculating that I just told himself he wasn't funny.

anyway, that's my one "and Einstein clapped" story, but it's real.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 month ago (2 children)

When chud relatives of mine pulled the "just joking while being a bigot/creep/asshole" thing, the best response that shut them up the most (not always, but most reliably) was making this face: dean-neutral . In anti-narcissist circles, it's called grey rocking.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago

Yessssss letting people sit in the discomfort

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

That's how I shut my dad down when he starts his racist bullshit baiting for a response. It works better than arguing and has the benefit of requiring next to no effort.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 month ago (1 children)

libertarian-approaching It'S 😂 jUsT my-hero a 😂 JoKe melon-musk BrO agony

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 month ago

The "it's okay to be assholish/bigoted/creepy if it's le epic joek" era has been a disaster for the human race.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 month ago (1 children)

For chuds, the funny is that a rich powerful asshole was a rich powerful asshole again.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Kinda like Marvel humour but worse

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Joss Whedon, bringer of "well, that just happened" trends to cinema, was a massive sex pest and creep himself, so it checks out.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

One of those people who could never stop talking and loudly interrupting while watching a movie, the treats which they purportedly enjoyed, constantly saying “that’s not how he would actually react though”, “bus drivers don’t dress that nice in real life”, “why would he do that?”, “he could just shoot them”, “nobody talks like that in real life”, “shouldn’t they have done this instead?” etc. became a filmmaker and had the characters do that instead of your uncle.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Some of the worst I've seen on the internet are armchair fleet admiral Trek bazingas. "Why don't they just transport the warp core out of the enemy ship? Why don't they just transport that guy's heart out of his chest? Why don't they just transport the crew into deep space?" smuglord smuglord smuglord

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

As if jokes can't be creepy.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

This is always why when speaking in the general public, I like to use “sus” when it’s so obvious a chud will pull the “I trolled you” card. I’m not explicitly “taking the bait”, I’m just saying what he said was sus.

Especially when we know what company he keeps so such a response would be golden. Oh, he is trolling someone by threatening SA? Wow, that’s sus considering Musk’s history.

If the right is going to try to pull this “I’m not touching you” crap, so will I.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

An Imgur link was detected in your comment. Here are links to the same location on alternative frontends that protect your privacy.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago

It's not gross, creepy, and misogynistic if what you're saying is a gross, creepy, and misogynistic joke.

The absolute biggest brain to have ever existed just weighed in.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago

I've been workshopping this new bit where I cat call women from my car window as I drive by but it seems like comedy is dead. Even the high schoolers get all indignant now because of the woke

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago

She's not going to fuck you bro.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

Oh so you were saying creepy shit and you were self aware?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago

ha joke's on you, I was only pretending to be an insufferable creep

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Knock knock

Who’s there?

I want to curb stop Elon Musk

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

melon-musk "That's not a jo-"

fash-bash

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I would argue that it doesn't matter if it's a joke.

Even if he intended it as a joke and she perceived it as a joke, it would still be tasteless and disgusting.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

Yeah, no shit it's a joke. From a serial Quiverfull incel like Elon it's still creepy as hell.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Your honor, is there not a chance that this absent father meant "i have so many kids, you can just take one of mine?"

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

The prosecution can just turn the spigot and show the flood of bazinga creep shit that's being prompted to treat printers by bazinga creeps, right now. That shit isn't about handing over already-existing abused and neglected kids. kombucha-disgust

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Drej Queen's too creeped out on to handle this Drej Tank contribution; hopefully the Swifties come up with some great parodies sometime soon.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I don’t think it’s a good look for the guy who’s palling around with Epstein’s listers to threaten to sexually assault someone for daring to disagree with him and then when someone holds up the mirror he tries saying “trolololol! I TROLLED you! U mad? U mad?”

It’s bad enough that he uses “I trolled you” to win arguments despite being in his 50s. A tactic I saw even 4chan call out as stupid multiple times. But seriously, that SPECIFIC threat…and knowing the pictures of him with certain people?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

I'm dreadfully aware of that. It actually kind of works because my-hero is a predator with receipts to show for it, both "joking" and otherwise.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I read the details because you linked them, just now.

dead-dove-1

dead-dove-2

(CW: extreme Epstein-tier enlightened kiddie predator ideology)

spoiler

Quoting directly from Schrödinger’s diaries, Moore revealed that the physicist justified his attraction to girls by considering that, being a genius (which he believed no woman ever could be), he was naturally entitled. “It seems to be the usual thing that men of strong, genuine intellectuality are immensely attracted only by women who, forming the very beginning of the intellectual series, are as nearly connected to the preferred springs of nature as they themselves. Nothing intermediate will do, since no woman will ever approach nearer to genius by intellectual education than some unintellectuals do by birth so to speak.”

epsteingelion