Try ordering at a french breakfast joint if you want to learn what true humiliation feels like. Having your French criticized by an unexpectedly persistent native speaker is unforgettable. I ordered coffee not crepes, you pretentious Italian-derivative median fish in the world’s tiniest pond. I see you snickering. Who orders a raspberry coffee? Guillaume, if you’re reading this, I hope you never eat a decent croissant again for the rest of your life.
I'm a stereotypical metalhead, with the all black clothes, long hair, and monster tshirts and I have no problem ordering goofy shit. I'll get the fruitiest drink they have and down it with my pinky up, no problem.
Maybe im the weird one, but I will happily order stuff like the "rooty tooty fresh 'n' fruity pancakes" exactly as named on the menu with a huge grin on my face. Or if im feeling silly, I'll ask for it with a completely deadpan monotone while looking the waiter in the eye.
If you're already at IHOP to begin with, saying "rooty tooty fresh 'n fruity" does not increase your level of shame.
Customer walks out, goes to a non-corporate local diner where they call them "Fruit Pancakes"
I loved that skit on CollegeHumor. https://youtu.be/gwChStnnidA
Anything suboptimal is unacceptable.
Source: have ordered at a restaurant before
(Actually once a server told me there might be a group of 20 people and EVERY SINGLE ONE of them will wait for the server to say “…and would you like hash browns or home fries? Wheat or white toast? Buttered or butter on the side?” to EVERY one of them. Thanked me when I picked up after the two people before me were asked to specify a couple things, then explained that.)
Probably because they don't, and this is made up is my guess.
"I want the three piece menu"
"we do not have a three piece menu"
"It says so on the poster right above your head"
"Oh, you want the threesome. Gotcha"
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