Men's Liberation
This community is first and foremost a feminist community for men and masc people, but it is also a place to talk about men’s issues with a particular focus on intersectionality.
Rules
Everybody is welcome, but this is primarily a space for men and masc people
Non-masculine perspectives are incredibly important in making sure that the lived experiences of others are present in discussions on masculinity, but please remember that this is a space to discuss issues pertaining to men and masc individuals. Be kind, open-minded, and take care that you aren't talking over men expressing their own lived experiences.
Be productive
Be proactive in forming a productive discussion. Constructive criticism of our community is fine, but if you mainly criticize feminism or other people's efforts to solve gender issues, your post/comment will be removed.
Keep the following guidelines in mind when posting:
- Build upon the OP
- Discuss concepts rather than semantics
- No low effort comments
- No personal attacks
Assume good faith
Do not call other submitters' personal experiences into question.
No bigotry
Slurs, hate speech, and negative stereotyping towards marginalized groups will not be tolerated.
No brigading
Do not participate if you have been linked to this discussion from elsewhere. Similarly, links to elsewhere on the threadiverse must promote constructive discussion of men’s issues.
Recommended Reading
- The Will To Change: Men, Masculinity, And Love by bell hooks
- Politics of Masculinities: Men in Movements by Michael Messner
Related Communities
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"Son, don't be a Nazi."
"OMG literally 1984."
Borderline incel horseshit.
Nevermind, outright incel horseshit.
I've heard this a lot - almost always from smirking fascists. The sort who think the left do anything but discuss. They talk so much they get nothing done.
Right-wing conversations are empty slogan contests, in a manipulative tone of voice. Like "original sin for being boys," a fucking obvious strawman, commonly spat when someone describes toxic masculinity. Which is not a criticism of masculinity any more than "don't eat poisoned apples" is a criticism of apples.
Oh, like the Strasserites. Sincere anticapitalists committed to a strong national identity, right up until they were dragged into the street and shot on the Night of the Long Knives because they were fucking Nazis.
You accuse me of using a strawman later then use the biggest strawman ever.
You don't believe sex and money have gotten more competitive over time? (Just look at tinder just look at the working poor)
You think it's good for society if sex and money gets more competitive over time? If no then what have I said that's wrong?
He's the best way I can describe it. The right will say that "taxes should be low and that people should make their own way in life, so people either need to pay for their own education or get their parents to do it". The left would say "education should be free". That's part 1, part 2 is the right will say "The best applicant should get the job" the left will say "it doesn't matter about who is best what we want is more women, so all the male applicants can be ignored" (which is never reversed either). Part 1 most people are left part 2 most people are right. Unfortunately the left are shooting themselves in the foot.
It's always toxic masculinity and men are always responsible for it. Even if a boy is young and has never made a decision in their life they are told they are responsible for toxic masculinity and need to fix it. The term itself is sexist as it implies, and is used, to say men are entirely at fault for this. Toxic feminism is never talked about. Women are never told they need to stop with the toxic masculinity. They are never told to stop expecting men to be emotionless and strong all the time, instead men are told to have more emotion. Yet for most men they say "when I showed emotion to my girlfriend she used it against me or we broke up" yet somehow that's mens fault.
You put "rightthink" and "wrongthink" in your first sentence. Don't whine about an Orwell connection when you made it.
One, those topics are not related, and slapping them together is a tell.
Two, talking about relationships as nothing but sex, and also a competition, is depressingly transparent on a level I'm not sure words can convey. The fact you asked this question is damning. The answer is no, but the answer doesn't matter, because it's like asking about "Muslim birthrates" or "human biodiversity." The framing itself is fucked. If you yourself are not a diet Nazi then you're getting ideas from people who definitely are. Being human feels kinda broken, and someone offered a simple scapegoat that feels satisfying to hammer on, even though you know the implications are horrific: "I can’t even conceive of how that would happen."
Describing access to vaginas as some kind of resource to be distributed is dehumanizing - and anyone suggesting you're owed a woman is a fucking monster.
Three, concentration of wealth is intrinsic to right-wing economics. So congratulations on figuring out those suck. Shame your mouth's still full of their dishonest takes about gender equality.
Arguments are easy when you just make shit up.
Because it'd be toxic femininity, genius. And of fucking course feminists address how stereotypes about women impact women - but the ranting Youtube manosphere dorks you seem to get your information from do not understand the concept. They think pushing girls toward pink and frills and cooking and babies is good, actually, even when it's exaggerated to exclusionary extremes, and girls who don't do that suffer ostracism and mockery. That's the exact mirror of boys suffering when cliche masculine associations are twisted into unyielding demands... usually at the hands of other boys.
No feminist is out there telling boys to get laid or they're a failure. That's y'all. You do that shit - as you're doing in these very comments - and you scoff at the label for it, because you don't like how it sounds.
A rose by any other name would have just as many pricks.
Looks like we are going to have to start at the basics with this one.
noun: strawman an intentionally misrepresented proposition that is set up because it is easier to defeat than an opponent's real argument
The Nazi comment you made was a strawman. Nice one.
Then I pointed it out and you switched it to me complaining about 1984. Again nice strawman.
Wow yet another strawman
Yet another strawman! I never said anything of the sort.
No I've seen it first hand and it's been in the news. Women get way more leg ups than men and numbers get capped or reserved.
Think this was in reference to women attacking and looking down on men for being unmanly. Yet no mention of how women should behave better, who's responsible for that?
Haha its like you've not met women. Women always make out guys are pissy because they can't get laid or because they are short. But I've never seen guys do it, guys just enjoy having sex that's why they try to get it. And very frequently they help each other.
Man what a complete mess of a comment haha.
Diet Nazis are the subject of the article. That's what parents' sons become, when they "slide to the right." Your lack of clarity in pointless whining does not make my dismissal the problem.
Your lies about what you said in plain fucking English help nobody. You wrote: "you don’t believe sex and money have gotten more competitive over time?" You describe sex as a competition, in as many words. You directly conflate it with competition for money.
Regarding guys "getting girls," you explicitly mused about "evening out that somehow."
Stand by what you say or shut up.
You've been that guy, in this conversation. Examples in omnipresent media are so plentiful I'd be here all day slapping your face with them just to call you liar again. Have you ever watched a single action movie, boner comedy, or high-school drama? Try it some time, it'll be a novel experience, if you're not just obviously full of shit.
If you don't care what words mean then I won't care about you.
I was on about how children grow up and the lack of discourse and ability to think for themselves. I'm sorry you were unable to understand that and had to take the extreme examples only.
Because they are. Everything is a competition, work, housing, relationships, sex, money that's just how it is. Sure it's not the same as a foot race competition but you still competing against others that's the defintion of the word.
That's not distributing a resource though. You said that. All I was musing was that it would be healthier if people and society if people weren't chasing what they want all the time. If some guys weren't fucking a different girl everyweek and chasing that high, if guys weren't trying to emulate those guys just to get one bit of positive attention from women, if women weren't casually shagging some guy out of their league then remaining single because they "can't get a good guy" but really they been fucking guys who have no interest in settling they just been playing the game. I think society would be better. How that happens I don't know. If you dont agree with that you must look fondly on the pickup cluture as much as the "artist" do. Education probably the answer maybe something like mens clubs could be one example as I said before were you can get intergenerational knowledge and guys can tell younguns what's important in life. But really it's a difficult problem and whether you agree or not I don't think that's the optimal state of society, what is I don't know.
Weirdly I have had this abuse from women. Not from guys when I was a virgin as a child, but I got it from girls. I didnt get it from guys either, i did get ribbed when I hit on a girl and failed but only in a light humoured funny way, but I did get it from girls. Which seeing as I'm 6'1 and got the nickname "top shagger" in my university rugby club it really goes to show how high the bar is for girls and how hurtful they actually try to be. Like I said I'm 6'1 and slept around so I'm not really bothered, but I can see and empathise with others. I don't think it's fair to out of the blue say things like "if you was taller girls would like you". But whatever, girls seem to think that's a good thing to say.
What an open wound of a comment.
And not in any of the ways you seem to think.