this post was submitted on 11 Feb 2024
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  • A 63-year-old man died on a Lufthansa flight on Thursday, according to Swiss-German outlet Blick.
  • Witnesses told the outlet the man had blood gushing from his nose and mouth.
  • The witnesses said passengers were screaming at the sight.
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[–] [email protected] 39 points 9 months ago (2 children)

My wife and I have both taken CPR classes together. She has very strict wishes about when I should render aid to her. Basically there has to be a 90% chance of an almost instant full recovery before I'm allowed to help her at all if something goes wrong. She knows the risks and so do I. I'm supposed to give her up so I don't let her down.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Hands down the best comment I have ever read. The subject. The setup. The payoff. The layers. Genius.

We are not worthy. It’s downhill from here. Just… perfect!

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago

I am from the internet. I'm here to help.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

I was really readying a polite, "No you should definitely render aid first and ask questions later" lecture until your comment made me read that again...slowly.

That setup was subtle and very well done. Bravo @[email protected]

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Basically there has to be a 90% chance of an almost instant full recovery before I’m allowed to help her at all

Are you able to make the determination, or just haven't taken a CPR class?

I ask because that's a lot of pressure put on you, to try to make that kind of emergency diagnosis, especially if you're not in the medical profession.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I believe they’re thinking of a full commitment that you wouldn’t get from any other guy.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I believe they’re thinking of a full commitment that you wouldn’t get from any other guy.

What?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

FauxPseudo rickrolled us.

Lol! Oh fuck! Well, somedays you get the bear, and other days the bear gets you.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Many people are no strangers to this type of agreement. But for those who are not familiar, I believe this video has gotta make you understand.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

this video

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago (2 children)

There are two things my wife wanted me to know when I started dating her. The first was that she was polyamorous. And the second was that she has always wanted to be dead. That last one has changed over the years she has known me. But the CPR class didn't educate me on the risks of CPR. That I have learned from other sources. I know eventually this will result in cops and lawyers to cause me problems. But she is still very firm on the idea that it should never render aid to her unless it's going to be a quick fix. She cannot stand the idea of being a burden to anyone.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

Make sure she gets an advance medical directive. I keep forgetting to set one up, but basically you can say when you can be revived, etc

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Remind her you will have a lifetime burden of guilt if you don't attempt to resuscitate her

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

I'd have a lifetime of guilt if she was there staring into empty space. There is no easy answer.