The Onion

4431 readers

1780 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 2 years ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

306

Biden Announces He’s Reheating Chili If Anyone’s Interested (www.theonion.com)

submitted 9 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

22 comments fedilink hide all child comments

WASHINGTON—Stating that it was as easy to prepare 330 million helpings as one, President Joe Biden announced Thursday that he was reheating chili if anyone was interested. “I’m going to pop some chili into the microwave in a minute or so if anyone wants some,” said Biden, who raised his eyebrows as he gestured emphatically at the large container of leftover meat and beans and repeated “anyone want in on this?” “It smells good. I bet it tastes good, too. It’s from Tuesday, but it should still be good. Better, even. It gives the flavors time to mingle. Alright, last chance if anyone wants any. You’ll need to get past security to get into the White House, but I can arrange that.” At press time, Biden was attempting to entice the nation by shaking a bag of oyster crackers.

link: https://www.theonion.com/biden-announces-he-s-reheating-chili-if-anyone-s-intere-1851174872

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Out of all the shit the Onion puts out, why they gotta joke about some chili? That’s plain evil. EVIL!

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Seriously, they got no chili chill

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

Reminds me of a joke though:

Yo mama so stupid she heard it was gonna be chilly, so she went outside with a bowl and spoon.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

Can’t tease me with a headline like that. I got my hopes up and everything.