this post was submitted on 17 Nov 2023
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Lemmy Shitpost
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Step one to befriend a racoon: take that corpse you've been hiding in you basement the last few days into the woods and start digging a hole. Once the hole is dug, cut off a limb and cover it in peanut butter and position it in such a way so that the raccoons can't tell there is a hole. Wait until the raccoons fall in the hole and find the alpha racoon. The alpha racoon will either be the largest or most aggressive racoon in the pit, so be careful.