this post was submitted on 28 Oct 2023
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I agree. A good first date should be something that lasts about an hour, is a light activity in a public space (like a good walk or a cup of coffee and some boardgames), which should open up the possibility for making the date last longer, if the connection is there, or which gives a polite "out" if it isn't.
Taking someone to a restaurant on a first date is a bad idea. It's gonna cost a lot of money, which creates a weird sort of vibe, and it keeps you captive for way too long, with no clear "end" to the date. It's just barely above going to the movies, because at least you can talk. Meeting over dinner is pretty intimate, that's a 2nd date thing (or something you escalate the 1st date into, if it goes well).
This of course comes from someone who lives in a walkable city in a country with a culture of splitting the bill. It'll probably vary for you yanks. But seriously I think a good first date is something light, casual, safe and short. You're trying to find out if you wanna get to know each other better, and you might find out you don't. If that's the case then it sucks being in a situation where you can't leave, and where there is no polite way of declining at the end.
A good (and cheap) alternative is a picnic.