Misogynistic trans guys keep showing up at our center? (hexbear.net)

submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) by kristina@hexbear.net to c/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns@hexbear.net

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All of these guys tend to be younger, it seems to be a new trend cause we didn't have issues like this 10 years ago. They'll come in, talk only to other gay guys, and exclude women (incl trans women) from all conversations to the point it becomes very awkward. This has happened 3 times in the past 2 years or so. We had an event recently and we had a handful of trans people show up. I tried to talk to everyone to just say hi (I'm the organizer after all) and the guy just stared at me?? Then one of the sweetest trans ladies there talked to me about how she was trying to get contact details for people so we could, y'know, be a community, and the guy apparently told her that all of his chats and local groups for trans men were men only and that they had so many issues with trans women trying to make LGBT spaces all about them so they only let trans men in. She was just looking for people to hang out with! The lack of solidarity here was shocking to me.

Maybe it's some social media thing? Over compensation? Idfk. Shits getting weird.

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[-] alexei_1917@hexbear.net 3 points 22 hours ago

My brother is the most horrifically toxically masculine dickhead I know. Just because he doesn't have a dick, doesn't seem to preclude him from thinking with the wrong head and being a dick.

(Our dad's a massive dickwad too, but usually not in misogynistic or toxically masculine ways, he's just a crappy person, in ways that would be exactly the same if he was a woman.)

I think trans men can often be worse for this than a lot of cis guys, cause they feel like they've got something to prove - I know my fluidity can make me try to compete with cis men in stupid masculinity contests sometimes (though usually this happens when I'm shifted feminine, actually - as a guy I don't care, it's easier to avoid crying and emotion if I don't do dangerous shit I could get hurt at just because the other guys are doing it, but as a girl I get a thrill out of beating the boys at some traditionally masculine task despite being not just a woman, but probably wearing something pink and a skirt that day - my dad can say to my brother "a real man could do this" in front of me in a cute sundress, and I'll go over there and do the damn task to shut them up).

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[-] SwitchyandWitchy@hexbear.net 6 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 12 hours ago)

Most of this is adding to the discussion so I don't want to remove it but please remove the joke about genitals, it's shitty to bring up a trans person's lack of the genitals that they probably want and we don't want to trigger anybody's dysphoria.

this post was submitted on 06 Aug 2026

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