I (23M) am becoming increasingly aware that my regular exposure to political content seems to be incompatible with my own mental well-being.
I was raised by two narcissistic parents, one of whom was violent. I have very few positive or loving memories. My trauma turned my brain into a 24/7 threat detector. I'm constantly thinking about everything and everyone that could kill me or take everything I have.
The Internet has taught me that the world is less awful than the hellish place I came from. But I've hit a wall where I can't get better because I am constantly being reminded by well-meaning people that everything in the U.S. is going to shit.
My trauma narrative eats this stuff up. It sees fascists on the streets, impending financial and ecological crises, the dangers of cars, widespread hyperindividualism, the decline of third spaces, and constant phone and social media use. Then it says, "Nobody can be trusted because capitalism makes everyone shallow and selfish. Going outside is dangerous because of cars and fascists. Most people don't want to socialize because they are too busy. There are no good places to meet anyone. Everyone who does socialize is just a fair-weather friend because support is outsourced to paid therapy and the eroding welfare system. I'll never be good enough for a partner because I can't build a stable life and dating apps are designed to not work. Any job I get won't last long because of the collapsing economy. Going to college is too financially risky. There is no stability. Nothing good ever lasts. My progress will be wiped out by systemic forces far beyond my control."
It seems like U.S. politics is about instability and collapse at this point, and because I have so few positive memories, it feels like life itself is about instability and collapse. Your money, your job, your social circle, your health, everything you've worked for -- all of it could just go up in smoke tomorrow. I can't take anything for granted or have any confidence in the future. I can't fully enjoy anything because I'm too busy thinking about how I'll cope with its inevitable loss.
Is this really what life is? Just watching every good thing disappear? Being born into a mostly-functioning society just to watch it fall apart? Knowing you'll have to weather every struggle alone because people only care about themselves? Being promised a stable life and career all throughout school only for the rug to be pulled at the last minute?
There has to be more to life than this.
Is staying on the Internet really worth it?
(Also yes I go to therapy, I'm working on myself but that shit is hard af sometimes)
It sounds like you used the Internet to figure out that your home life sucked and life is better out there. But now the Internet is literally having the opposite effect. My advice at this point is literally spend less time on the Internet. Think of the Internet as the person who helped you to realize there are better things in life. But then that friend starts to drag you down. You get rid of the friend. That sounds harsh, but that’s just how life works.
I don’t know if you live in a big town or a small town, but I would say think of something or some things that you enjoy. Join clubs or groups that do those sorts of things. I saw this comment the other day on another post. It isn’t about quantity. It is an about quality.
One really good friend is The equivalent of 100 average friends or just acquaintances.
I’m not saying don’t have average friends or acquaintances, I’m saying look for the ones who are good friends.
A good friend is the one who you can call at two in the morning and say “ Shit, I just put my car in the ditch, I’m probably legally drunk, And if the cops find me, I am screwed” . That really good friend , he’ll be there.
A good friend is the one who you call when you find out your significant other is cheating on you, and understands the best course of action or at least can help you find the best course of action. Pro tip keying the cheaters car is not the best idea.
Acquaintances will simply say oh man I’m so sorry but then you don’t hear anything more from them.
Look for the good friends in those groups. And yes, I know what you’re saying , It’s hard to find people to hang out with. But that’s why I’m saying find clubs find organizations that do what you enjoy.
Here’s a really good example of what I mean by the Internet can bring you down. People in Scotland were afraid to come to the US because of what their media was saying about the US. What their media was saying how we treat other people. Go on YouTube and look at World Cup soccer fans from Scotland and you will see people who are amazed at how they got treated. How well they got treated.
And that’s going from Scotland to the US. I went from Minnesota to Washington DC a couple of years ago. As a tourist. I was concerned that everybody was gonna be cold and distant. Because that’s what I’ve always been told. That the people in DC are basically cold assholes. You couldn’t be more wrong about that statement. Everybody That I ran across was very nice. And it didn’t matter if it was in a restaurant if it was on the street if it was in a museum, it didn’t matter. People in general were and are quite pleasant.
The media loves to fear monger. And you see a lot of that on the Internet. But the reality is most people are actually very nice.