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I can't stop when its time to stop
(lemmy.today)
Hello, I have a big problem that interferes with every aspect of my life. And I want to ask you all if you experience this too and/or you have any ideas on how to improve this behavior?
The Problem
When I do anything interesting, or anything that just isn't completely boring, I can't stop when it's time to stop and start the doing the next thing. I always think, something like "Just five minutes more" and then I sometimes finish hours later than I had planned. This breaks all time-sensitive plans and also causes me to go to sleep far too late.
I don't think that its simple procrastination, because what I feel when I do it, is not about not wanting to start the next thing, but about not wanting to stop the current thing.
List of things I already do / have already tried
- Setting up alarms that remind me that I need to stop doing the current thing and start doing the next thing
- Creating schedules
- Configuring the Wifi Router to turn of at certain times: This is very effective (when I have taken out my SIM card before), but its only helping with cutting the wifi at the end of the day for bedtime, not other time sensitive tasks that are necessary to even enable me to sleep on time (like eating dinner early enough)
- Buffer time: Most of the time I can't get my self to view the buffer deadline as the actual deadline
- Reading books about habits: I read some books about habits, but these books are mostly about starting an activity, or don't starting an activity at all, but I need to do certain things, and stop doing them on time.
- This list is probably incomplete
Based on what you’ve said already it seems like you are focusing on depriving yourself dopamine. I don’t think that will help you get over the hump. Maybe in some cases because turning off WiFi sets a hard deadline in your brain but as you’ve already noticed it doesn’t work for regular stuff.
This may not work for you but it has been incredibly successful for me. It’s NSFW so bear that in mind: masturbation. I use masturbation as my go to activity to give myself that rush of dopamine and it has the added benefit of being a one and done activity. I got off so now I start my routine. It definitely hurts me in other areas and has a lot of social stigma associated with it but my adhd already cost me my marriage so at this point I’m sticking with what works. It has definitely kept me on track and is almost like a waypoint to jumpstart my daily routine.
If that’s not your cup of tea you just have to find what works. An activity that feeds you the dopamine you need to get started. I’ve heard dark chocolate can be good due to the caffeine so it’s like a double hit of dopamine.