submitted 2 days ago by sidalsolgun@lemmy.ca to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone

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My family is shit. They're also the reason why I transitioned too late. I kinda knew they were assholes since my childhood but after realizing trans, and seeing their reactions, I took what I saw on raisedbynarcs subreddit more seriously and I wish I realized gaslighting earlier too...

They were violent, humiliating, bullying, swearing, making fun of me, neglecting, extremely controlling, threatening, narcissistic, bigoted, EXTREMELY ignorant, and never taught me anything to become an independent person as they wanted to keep controlling me forever.

Now I'm stuck with them for a while until paperwork is done but sometimes I can't stand them anymore. Most shelters in Toronto are extremely disgusting and dangerous. I'm unemployed with zero skills.

I don't want to apply college with my deadname so I have to wait until the docs but it's depressing.

I will also apply for ODSP soon but I'm so depressed. There isn't even 1 good thing in my life...

I miss 2022 when I was hopeful for this country and had dreams...

Stupid me

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[-] erinmeow@piefed.blahaj.zone 4 points 2 days ago

kazakhstan is occupied by putin isnt option, georgia too

turkey might be temporary option, armenia for now might be option too, putler isnt broken last elections but tried, even argentina is non-visa for now(90 day without visa), visas is hell since most countries even doesnt have visa centers and only thru armenia for example, probably will go for it

i hopefully on diy hrt now and managed to start at ~15.8 yo, i never scared todo diy, instead did research and put all effort todo it

i need neurology treatment for my antipsychotic damage, but medicine is sux, neurology is nootropology here, and fck meds are just isnt available......., huh two self-meds really helped me, but tolerance hits very fast like ~4 day, aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa why any helpful med just stop working, but antipsychotics, ssri's, are unstoppably destroying me, i shut off antipsychotic finally 4 months ago, and feel better n better without this shit, and fck my cognitive function is much better now, also shutting down SSRI now, also feel A TON better

adhd meds are completly banned and prison for getting it somewhere else, its more illegal than opioids incl fentanyl...... any fcking dopaminergic meds are ass controlled(cuz after antipsychotic isnt only adhd, but motor problems), those assholes basically wanted make me parkinsons, two asshole psychiatrist wanted put me on multiple antipsychotics at once............ one wanted me put on promazine daily together with horse dose of aripiprazol...............

meow meow mreaow at least after tapering shit, i dont have dysmorphobia, dysphoria and depression nyaaaaayynyaya mr;pmprmpmrprm pAOWIOAIPWIAPIWPIPIdfhalkj kajdlkjfklaj BUT physically feel awful......

this post was submitted on 25 Jul 2026

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