Yet it still makes one feel kind of bad which honestly sucks, because it's the victims feeling bad only, every step of the way.

I kind of think that as long as the sort of violent pathriarchy that we have fostered exists, there should be real material deterrants that actually deter something. In so many cases the abusers are protected, shielded and if they do get convicted those are typically slaps in the wrist. So I am in favor of the type of authoritarianism where this is condemned so strongly on a systemic level that it puts some fear into the abusers. While at the same time focusing on changing our culture to something where this no longer is as common. On the global scale it feels like only China is on the side of the victim.